My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Season 4
by Dennis Fielder
Summary: An alternate version of Season 4 I worked on just after I became a fan of the show, so it ignores Season 4. Once the real Season 4's over, I'll do a rewrite to incorporate it, so consider this a rough draft. Also, the first few chapters are based on Bedknobs and Broomsticks.
1. A New World Part 1

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 1: A New World Part 1

(It opens at Canterlot as Twilight, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie arrive in front of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna.)

Twilight: Princess Celestia, what's up?  
Celestia: My sister and I have received word that the Changelings are amassing to attack again.  
Rainbow Dash: Bring 'em on! We'll show them again!  
Luna: Admirable, Rainbow Dash, but futile. We don't have the numbers to fight such a huge army. Our only hope is a lost spell for Substitutiary Locomotion.  
Twilight: Ooh... Substitutiary Locomotion...  
Pinkie: Substitutiary Locomotion! Hooray! . . . What's that?  
Twilight: It's the act of making an object move under its own will. Like if one of Rarity's dresses began moving around on its own without anyone in it.  
Pinkie: Ooh...!  
Twilight: So where is it?  
Luna: We don't know. We only know of its existence in another world.  
Rarity: Another world? What do you mean?  
Luna: A world where the rules of science and logic overcame our magic ways.  
Twilight: Whoa...  
Applejack: So what are we waiting for?  
Celestia: A spell that will allow you to blend into that world.

(Celestia and Luna's horns glow, and when the light fades, the six are human beings in clothes that match their coats, and their Cutie Marks moving to their ankles.)

Applejack: Land sakes.  
Rainbow Dash: What the-? Where are my wings?! Where are my wings?!  
Pinkie: Ooh! Look at us! Look at us! We're... We're... What are we?  
Luna: Creatures called humans. We'll send some assistance soon, but the spell that will allow you to cross worlds is difficult enough on its own, so we'll need rest afterwards.  
Twilight: Right. Come on girls.

(Cut to Grand Rapids, Michigan as the girls arrive.)

Rarity: Oh my, look at all these huge, lovely buildings. It's amazing.  
Pinkie: Wow, what tiny trains!

(They look at the cars as they speed past.)

Fluttershy: Um, maybe we should find somewhere to begin look.

(They begin checking around when a young man with black hair and brown eyes about the girls' age sees them looking around and goes to them.)

Man: Hey, need some help?  
Rarity: Oh, um... We're just looking for something.  
Man: Can I help?

(Two other men about Doug's age arrive. One has sandy brown hair, blue eyes, and is very skinny. The other is brown haired and blue eyed.)

Man 2: Hey man, what's up?  
Pinkie: We're looking for-  
Twilight: Shh!  
Man: Hey, we really wanna help.  
Twilight: Well, we are gonna need it. We're new here.  
Applejack: Really new.  
Man: Great. My name's Doug. These are my friends Rob and Chris.  
Rob: Hey.  
Chris: Hi.  
Pinkie: Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! So where are we gonna start looking?!  
Twilight: First, is there a place we can talk in private.  
Doug: Oh sure.

(Cut to Doug's condo as Pinkie and Rainbow Dash look all around.)

Pinkie: Ooh, what's this big shiny box?  
Doug: It's a TV.  
Twilight: Look you three, this is gonna sound weird, but I need you to really listen. When I said we weren't from around here, we really, really aren't from around here. We're not even actually humans. We're from a place called Equestria, and we're in big trouble, so we're here to find the spell for Substitutiary Locomotion.  
Doug: Whoa, a spell that makes stuff move on its own...  
Chris: This is really great!  
Rob: Oh come on, Chris. It's probably just a game.  
Doug: Sounds great! We're in!  
Twilight: Great. Now we just need to prepare for a long journey.  
Doug: Oh... Then maybe we shouldn't have met up here. All I've got in my fridge are four Hot Pockets, Broccoli, and Cauliflower.  
Rob: I'll grab us something from the store. You guys stay here.  
Pinkie: Okay. Now, what's this TV do?

(Doug turns it on as it's on Cartoon Network.)

Pinkie: Ooh...

(Then the lights begin flickering.)

Rainbow Dash: Candle on, candle off. Candle on, candle off.  
Applejack: Now Rainbow Dash, that aint neighborly.  
Doug: It's alright.  
Rarity: I say, what's this black box on the ground?  
Doug: My X-Box. Wanna play it with me while we wait?  
Pinkie: Ooh games! Games! Games!

(Pinkie begins jumping up and down on Doug's futon.)

Pinkie: I love games!  
Fluttershy: Um, maybe we shouldn't impose.  
Doug: Nah. You're guests.

(Cut to Canterlot as Discord prepares to head out while the Cutie Mark Crusaders come in.)

Applebloom: Hey, can we help out too?  
Sweetie Belle: Yeah! We can um... We can... We... Um...  
Scootaloo: Oh, this isn't gonna go well.  
Discord: Why not? It's always nice to have a new perspective.

(Discord snaps his fingers as they arrive in Grand Rapids as humans, with Discord looking like John De Lance. He also observes his face in a window.)

Discord: Hm... Not a bad look, if I do say so myself.  
Applebloom: Applejack? Applejack where are-

(Discord snaps his fingers as they disappear. Cut to Doug's apartment just as Rob and Chris come back when Discord and the Cutie Mark Crusaders appear.)

Discord: Hello my little ponies.  
Rob: Is that John De Lance from Star Trek?  
Discord: No, just a reasonable facsimile. I've got good news. I've narrowed down where the book that holds the spell is.  
Fluttershy: Oh, that's very good.  
Applejack: What the-? Applebloom?! What are you doing here?  
Applebloom: Me and the other Cutie Mark Crusaders wanted to help.  
Sweetie Belle: Yeah! We can um... Give you moral support and stuff.

(Scootaloo watches Rainbow Dash playing Forza Motor Sport.)

Scootaloo: Ooh, cool!  
Rarity: Um, excuse me, I believe we were about to find out where we're supposed to go.  
Rainbow Dash: Huh?  
Applejack: Turn the TV off.

(Twilight does it.)

Twilight: There. Now, where is it?  
Discord: A country called England.  
Rob: Oh cool! A free trip to England!  
Chris: When are we going?  
Discord: Right now.

(Discord snaps his fingers as they all suddenly appear in London.)

Rob: What the-? How did-? We were- What the heck just happened?!  
Doug: Wow, you guys really are magical.  
Twilight: Well of course. I mean, what does that TV thing run on?  
Doug: Electricity.  
Applebloom: You mean that stuff lightning's made outta?  
Doug: Yup.  
Twilight: Wow. That's actually kinda cool. So is that how those lights worked?  
Doug: Yeah.  
Twilight: This is really amazing.  
Discord: If I may interrupt this nice moment, I believe someone who can help you out is right across the street.

(They go over and see an English man about their age with a case that reads "Professor John Brown". He sets the case down as it opens up to reveal several dew-dads.)

John: Ladies and gentlemen!

(Sparks fly out of his hands.)

Fluttershy: Oh my.  
John: Gather around please, ladies and gentlemen!  
Twilight: Oh great. A male Trixie.  
John: Note the name, ladies and gentlemen, Professor John Brown. I am here to divert, amuse, and possibly even help you with the drudgery of the day. How can I enrich your lives?

(The gang walks up to John as he walks up to Rarity.)

John: My humble talents are at your command. Aw madam, what have we here?

(John pulls a coin out of Rarity's ear.)

Rarity: What the-?  
Doug: Oh come on, that's the oldest trick in the book.

(John swings the coin on some string he had attached to it.)

John: Yes my friend, a trick. Or to use a kinder word, an illusion, but what isn't in these troubled times? We live in a world of fakery and false ideas. It is not what things are.

(John holds up a cane as it seems to extend as he tosses it to Applejack.)

John: It is what they seem to be. Is that not so, madam?

(Applejack looks at the stick and finds that it's a collapsible toy.)

Scootaloo: This isn't the kinda help I expected.  
Sweetie Belle: I don't think it's the kinda help any of us expected either.  
John: You see it really doesn't matter what I do, what I do, as long as I do it...

(John shows a red cloth and turns it all around before pulling out a bushel of roses from it and hands them to Rarity.)

John: With a flair. What effect a little smoke is.

(He pulls out a pan as a flash packet goes off causing a fire to appear in the pan.)

John: With a dash of Hocus Pocus. And a scent of burning sulfur in the air.

(John puts the red cloth inside the pan and closes it. He opens it soon afterwards as a dove flies out.)

Fluttershy: Oh my, I hope that dove didn't get a cramp.  
John: _I'm a fraud, a hoax.  
A charlatan, a joke.  
But they love me everywhere.  
_  
(John gives Pinkie flowers that appear almost out of nowhere.)

Pinkie: Ooh, thank you.  
John: Thank you.

(He takes one away as the rest fall over, revealed as plastic.)

Pinkie: Ha-ha-ha! That was funny!  
John: Now ladies and gentlemen, for my next trick, may I draw your attention to this ordinary window glass. Framed in an ordinary, unprepared frame.

(He then holds up a nail.)

John: May I also draw your attention to this perfectly ordinary steel nail? Now I shall place the steel nail through the glass without breaking the glass.  
Rob (scoffing): Yeah right.  
John: Impossible you say, my friend? We shall see.

(John puts the nail through the glass as it sounds like it shatters, but as he pulls the nail out and shows it to them, there isn't a hole, and he hands it to Rainbow Dash who puts her hoof through as a shattering sound effect comes out.)

Rainbow Dash: Hey, this thing's rigged!  
Scootaloo: Yeah.  
John: That's the whole point my dears.  
_And it really doesn't matter  
What I say, what I say.  
As long as I say it with a flair.  
First I rattle off a ready stalk  
Of gibberish and poppycock,  
And fix you with my best hypnotic stare.  
_  
(He stares at Discord who just stares back and makes him blink a little before regaining his composure and continuing.)

John: _With my moans  
And groans and sufferific tones  
They have cheered me, everywhere.  
For it really doesn't matter  
What I say. What I say.  
I sell it when I tell it  
With a sheen of imagine.  
_  
(He reveals a box with a crystal ball in it as he waves his hand, making it float.)

John: The _magician's nursery rhyme._  
Abracadabra!

(He cuts the string holding it up as it falls back into the box.)

John: _You succumb to it every time.  
Wave a stick, and each trick,  
Will mystify and disarm.  
In fact to coin a fitting phrase,  
It works... Like a charm.  
So it really doesn't matter  
What I brew. What I brew.  
As long as I brew it with a flair.  
Though I've never cast a magic spell,  
I make the motions very well.  
My showmanship is far beyond compare.  
I'm a rogue. A rake.  
A mountebank of fake.  
But I do whate'er I dare.  
For it really doesn't matter  
What I do... What I do...  
You buy my charms and poxes  
'Cause they come in fancy boxes.  
To improve your ugly daughter,  
I've a vile of colored water.  
And my magic incantations  
Can be framed as decorations.  
Though there's really nothing to it,  
And of course you all see through it!  
You love me 'cause I do it...  
With a flair.  
_  
(Everyone can only stare in confusion.)

John: Now my little child, how would you like something?  
Applebloom: What?  
John: The mating call of the nightingale. Known as the bird of love?

(He holds up a fancy kazoo.)

John: With this little object, you can charm the very birds from the tree like so.

(He takes a bite of the kazoo and whistles perfectly like a nightingale.)

Fluttershy: Ooh...  
Applebloom: How much?  
John: For you, my young friend, one penny. One copper coin of the realm.

(She pulls out a small coin she brought with her as it has become a British pound.)

Applebloom: Here you go. You can keep the change.  
John: Thank you, and here you are.

(Applebloom takes it and does just what John does as she just blows, but she can't even make a whistle sound at all.)

Applebloom: It don't work. I've been cheated.  
Applejack: We're supposed to get help from this crook?!  
Discord: Yup.  
Rarity: Urgh. I'd rather spend the rest of my life looking for that confound book than work with such a man as this "John Brown".  
John: May I ask what you would've needed help with?  
Pinkie: We're looking for a book about Substitutiary Locomotives.  
Fluttershy: Locomotion.  
Pinkie: That too.  
John: Never heard of one. I did see an old crone with a circus buying an old book.  
Twilight: Really? What was it called?  
John: The Spells of... Azarath or something like that.  
Discord: Now do you see?  
Twilight: Oh, please, where's this circus lady live?  
John: Well it's a traveling zoo of mythical creatures, but like me, she's more flair than anything else, but if you insist.

(Cut to an old fair with a very old, hunched woman, as she has a servant who looks like Andy Serkis.)

Man: Now come along you lot, look at the marvels of Madame Leota.

(They look at a Chinese Dragon in a cage as Fluttershy squeaks nervously and hides behind Rob.)

Man: The legendary dragons. A serpent long and strong enough to crush a building with just one coil of its body.

(Fluttershy squeaks again.)

Man: Inside is the firepower to burn this whole country to the ground, and yet its skin is so cold, it burns!

(They go to a Manticore.)

Fluttershy: Oh, the poor little baby kitty.  
Rob: Little?!  
Man: That's no kitten ma'am. It's a Manticore. With the body of a lion, the face of a man, and the tail of a scorpion!

(They then go to a Unicorn.)

Twilight: Is that a... A unicorn?  
Doug: Looks more like a bicorn to me.

(They look and see the Unicorn, with a traditional horn, but with another horn in the shape of a dagger next to it. She then looks at Doug as the man continues.)

Unicorn: Can you see me, Mr. Halbeisen... Do you know what I am?

(The boys are in shock as Doug stares.)

Doug: Did that bicorn just... Talk?

To Be Continued...


	2. A New World Part 2

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 2: A New World Part 2

(It opens as everyone stares at the Unicorn.)

Doug: You can talk? But that means... You're real. You're a real unicorn.  
Rob: C-come on. There are no such things as unicorns.

(Rarity smacks Rob upside the head.)

Rob: Ow!  
Discord: Walked right into that one.  
Rob: How?  
Unicorn: Now Mr. Halbeisen and friends, look. Look at my fellow prisoners and tell me what you see.

(Cut to the Manticore as it fades into an elderly lion.)

Doug: That so called Manticore is really an old toothless lion.

(Pan to a satyr in a cage turning into an ape.)

Doug: And she had us believing that some poor ape with a twisted ankle was a satyr.

(Pan to the dragon as it's revealed as a snake.)

Doug: And that dragon is just a snake.

(Pan back to the gang.)

Doug: Illusions, all of them. Brown was right. This entire place is just one big parlor trick.  
John: Well, after seeing her, I'm afraid I'm starting to retract that statement.

(There's a barking sound as they all turn to see a large female Great Dane with three heads.)

Doug: That's no illusion. It's a real Cerberus.  
Unicorn: Indeed. Madam Leota captured her when she was but a pup. Please help us.  
Doug: Of course we will. We just need to grab a book she bought first.  
Twilight: ... This may be no surprise, but I've got an idea!

(Cut to that night as Madam Leota is sleeping in her cart as Doug and Chris sneak in. They go to the wall as the keys for all the cages are there, and he grabs them as Chris grabs the book, and they rush out.)

Twilight: "The Spells of Asteroth". We've found it!  
Doug: Okay, now we just need to get these little fellas out.

(Doug unlocks the Unicorn's cage as the lock suddenly laughs as it comes undone. Once the Unicorn leaves, her extra horn disappears.)

Rob: What the heck was that?!  
Twilight: Some kind of alarm spell?  
Unicorn: There's no time to explain.

(Doug quickly unlocks the other doors as the noise awakens Madam Leota as she comes out.)

Madam Leota: You! You little brats stole it!  
Applebloom: What do we do?  
Twilight: Oh, please let me still be able to do magic.

(Twilight casts a freezing spell as Madam Leota freezes in place.)

Pinkie: Hooray!  
Twilight: It won't last long! We've gotta get out of here!  
John: Quite right, my good woman.

(Doug and Fluttershy look at the locked up Cerberus as it moans, and they go to her.)

Applejack: Doug, Fluttershy, get back here! That thing'll kill y'all if you let it out!  
Doug: It wouldn't be fair to leave the poor thing here.

(Doug unlocks the door as the Cerberus jumps on the two.)

Rob: Doug!  
Rainbow Dash: Fluttershy!

(The two laugh as two of the dog's heads lick them.)

Fluttershy: That's right. You're just a sad little puppy, aren't you?  
Doug: Come with us, girl.  
Everyone: WHAT?!  
Doug: I shall call her Fluffy, and she shall be mine. She shall be my Cerberus.  
John: Right, now, about getting along.  
Unicorn: Indeed. We need a place to relax.  
John: I've got it. My own place, in a small neighborhood just outside of London.

(The unicorn's horn glows as they teleport there. It's an old relatively derelict house.)

Rarity: There must have been some mistake. You surely don't live here.  
John: As a matter of fact, I do, Rarity. I arrived here a few years back and found the front door opened. The house was deserted. In fact everyone had left the neighborhood.  
Applejack: Now why in Sam Hill would they do that?  
John: This might have something to do with it.

(John points out a small bomb halfway embedded into the ground.)

Doug: Hokey smokes, that's a World War II bomb from the Blitzkrieg! No wonder everyone left! I'm surprised you didn't high tail it and run!  
John: Yes, quite true. I am by nature, well a bit of a coward, but in the perverse nature of things, this diabolical object is quite possibly the best friend I ever had. It enables me for the first time in my life to live like a king.  
Fluttershy: B-but what if it goes off while you're inside?  
John: Impossible my dear. That bomb is most obviously a dud if it's been inert for all these decades.  
Twilight: Alright. Now I can just study up this book and learn about the Substitutiary Locomotion spell.

(They all go in as John goes to a table and hands Applebloom a story book.)

John: An old book from a nursery upstairs. I figured I owed you a piece offering as we're very likely to still be spending at least a little bit of time together.  
Applebloom: Gee, thanks Mr. Brown.

(Applebloom goes to the table and reads it as Doug goes to the Unicorn.)

Doug: Um, ma'am, how did you know my last name?  
Unicorn: Because an ancestor of yours was a dear friend of mine.  
Doug: Say huh?  
Unicorn: His name was Schmendrick the Magician.  
Doug: Schmendrick the Magician? But he was only a character in the Last Unicorn.  
Unicorn: A sad truth of a tale that in the end lacks evidence. It is to become legend and then myth.  
Doug: Then that'd make you... Amalthea.  
Amalthea: Indeed. Even when Madam Leota held me captive I kept a close eye on the family of my old friends.  
Sweetie Belle: Um, Miss Amalthea, how long were you held captive?  
Amalthea: It has been eleven hundred years since I last stepped on grass instead of the cold iron of my cage.  
Rob: That's impossible! That would make Madam Leota a good eleven centuries old!  
Amalthea: Indeed. She is a scavenger of magic. It was people like her, Mommy Fortuna, and another wizard's cruelty to animals that led me to create Equestria and rule it for its first few decades of life.  
Applejack: First few... Now hold on, what you're saying is that you're from home?  
Amalthea: Indeed I am, Applejack, and I must thank you for reuniting my daughters Celestia and Luna.  
Chris: Wow, this is so cool! Isn't this cool Rob?! I mean-  
Twilight: Chris, I'm trying to find the spell here! Now let's see... A traveling spell... Something to make a broomstick fly... Oh, I found- hey, this book's been torn in half!  
Scootaloo: What?! You mean we have to go back?!  
John: Oh, not at all. It got that way when I saw Leota buy it. There was some sort of scuffle over the shopkeeper believing Leota cheated him, and the book tore, so Leota got one half, and the shopkeeper got the other.  
Twilight: Oh boy... We're just lucky the last page is about Substitutiary Locomotion. "Substitutiary Locomotion. The lost art of bringing an inanimate object to life is contained in three simple words. These words are"

(Twilight flips through the whole book.)

Twilight: It's not here. It's not here! We came all the way to another world! Went through all of that, and it's not here!  
Doug: Whoa Twilight, relax. It has to be in the second half. So John, where would it be?  
John: Oh, it's probably been thrown away, but if it still exists, there's only one place to find it.  
Rarity: Where?

(Cut to an old London neighborhood as Amalthea teleports them there, now looking like her human form.)

John: _Portobello Road. Portobello Road.  
Street where the riches of ages are stowed.  
Anything and everything a chap can unload  
Is sold of the barrow in Portobello Road.  
You'll find what you want in the Portobello Road._

(They walk past several merchants holding their wares.)

Merchant: _Real alabaster!  
_John: _Genuine plaster.  
_Merchant 2: _A filigreed samovar owned by the czars.  
_Merchant 3: _A pen used by Shelly.  
_John: _A new Botticelli._  
Merchant 3: _The snipers that clipped old King Edward's cigars.  
_  
(John looks at it closely.)

John: Made in Hong Kong? Two bob a dozen, wouldn't you say?  
Discord: Ooh, I like this guy.  
Merchant 4: _Waterford crystal?  
_Merchant 5: _Napoleon's pistols!  
_Merchant 6: _Society heirlooms with genuine gems?!  
_Merchant 7: _Rembrandts. El Grecos. Toulouse Lautrecos.  
_John: _Painted last week on the banks of the Thames.  
_Twilight: Very interesting, but where do they sell books?  
John: Relax Twilight, there's a little place around the corner.  
Everyone: _Portobello Road. Portobello Road.  
Street where the riches of ages are stowed._  
John: _Anything and everything a chap can unload  
Is sold of the barrow in Portobello Road.  
_  
(Two young women in blue and pink walk past.)

Women: _You'll meet all your chums in the Portobello Road.  
_John (nervously): Nice to see you. Good-bye!  
Twilight: But what I want is the other half of this book!  
John: All in good time, my dear.

(Discord goes after the two girls who just left as Chris follows until his feet get frozen to the ground.)

Chris: Hey, wh-?  
Discord: Why? Because I can.

(He goes off with the two girls.)

Amalthea: Oh Lord.

(They arrive at a bookshop as Doug, Chris, and Pinkie are the most excited to look around.)

Doug: _There's pure inspiration in every fixation.  
_Shopkeeper: _No cheap imitation, not here in me store.  
With garments as such as was worn by a duchess.  
_Doug: _Just once at some royal occasion of yore._  
Twilight: Doug, I'm trying to find the other half of this book!  
Doug: Sorry.

(He puts a hat on her head.)

Doug: But you sure do look great in that hat.  
Twilight: Oh, you.  
Doug: _In Portobello Road. Portobello Road.  
The fancies and fineries of ages are showed.  
_  
(Cut to Rarity and Sweetie Belle dressed up in recently purchased coats and hats.)

Rarity: _A lady will always feel dressed a la mode.  
_Sweetie Belle: _In frillies she finds in the Portobello Road.  
_  
(Another bookkeeper piles book after book next to Twilight as she and Applejack.)

Bookkeeper: _Burke's Peerage. The Bride Book.  
The fishmonger's guide book.  
_Applejack: We're looking for the other part of the book my friend's holding, thank you kindly.  
Bookkeeper: _A Victorian Novel, the Unwanted Son?  
_Applejack: Aw.  
Twilight: Can't anyone focus around here?! We're trying to find the other half of the book!  
Bookkeeper: _The History of Potting._  
John: _"The Yearbook of Yachting"._  
Bookkeeper: _The Leather bound Life of Attila the Hun.  
_  
(They keep walking around as everyone, even Twilight begins to give in to the odd beauty of the place as Discord comes back looking very happy.)

Discord: _Portobello Road. Portobello Road.  
Street where the riches of ages are stowed.  
_  
(Cut to Rarity trying on jewelry.)

Rarity: _Artifacts to glorify a regal abode  
Are hidden in the flotsam of Portobello Road.  
_Amalthea: Rarity, I don't believe you need any more souvenirs. Especially not such expensive ones.  
Rarity (disappointed): Oh, I suppose you're right.  
Chris: _Tokens and treasures. Yesterday's pleasures.  
_Rob: _Cheap_ _imitations of heirlooms of old.  
_Rainbow Dash: _Dented and tarnished. Scarred and unvarnished.  
_Applejack: _In old Portobello they're bought, and they're sold.  
_Fluttershy: _Tokens and Treasures. Yesterday's pleasures.  
Cheap imitations of heirlooms of old.  
Dented and tarnished. Scared and unvarnished.  
In old Portobello, they're bought, and they're sold.  
_  
(Cut to the group finally getting back together as they find another bookshop.)

John: This good lady is looking for the other half of this book.  
Twilight: It's called The Spells of Asteroth.

(A figure eyes them and backs into the shadows.)

Bookkeeper 2: I don't keep any torn or damaged books here! What do you think I am? A ruddy white paper merchant?!  
John: Sorry sir. No offense.

(They walk on as Applebloom's eating an ice cream.)

Applebloom: _You can eat like a queen in the Portobello road!  
_John: Now if I'm right, there should be at least one more bookstore around here, somewhere.

(He finds a merchant playing a piano.)

John: Grandpa, you don't expect to sell a piano like that, do you? Let me have a go my dear fellow.  
Pinkie: Ooh yeah! It's my turn to sing!

(John begins playing.)

Pinkie: _Portobello Road! Portobello Road!  
All kinds of things are happening in Portobello Road!  
You'll feel like a ballerina when you're hopping like a toad!  
When you kick your heals up down in Portobello Road!  
_  
(Everyone begins dancing along, even Twilight, until it begins to rain and everyone closes up.)

Twilight: Oh!  
Amalthea: _Portobello Road. Portobello Road.  
Streets where the riches of ages are stowed.  
_Rob: Well, that was pointless.

(The man comes up.)

Man: I heard you were looking for something called the Spells of Asteroth.  
John: Indeed? Then how come you didn't say anything until everyone had closed up?  
Man: Does this answer your question?

(He holds out a knife.)

Doug: Holy-!  
John: Alright, so where is it?  
Man: It's with me boss, the Bookman. He'd like to see ya.  
Twilight: Okay.

(They go to the basement of an old bookstore filled with maps of Middle Earth as well as several copies of the Last Unicorn.)

Doug: Well, this can't be good.

(They're brought in front of an old man who looks like John Glover.)

Bookman: My, such a big party looking for half a book.  
Twilight: Well friends stick together.  
Bookman: And I see you have what I'm looking for as well. Maybe we can help each other.  
John: I'd rather help a cobra.  
Bookman: Would you prefer I'd ask my friend Swigburn to take what I want?

(Swigburn pulls out the knife as John gets up.)

John: Hey now, none of that.  
Bookman: It's all like a jolly detective story or jigsaw puzzle. We're both after the same spell. You have one clue, and I have the other.  
Twilight: Well... Then I guess the only sensible thing to do is share.

(Bookman walks up with his half.)

Bookman: I assume you're looking for the same thing I am. May I?

(They switch halves.)

Bookman: Let's see... Ah. "Substitutiary Locomotion. The lost art of bringing an inanimate object to life is contained in three simple words. These words are"  
Twilight: "Engraved on the star that was always worn by the Sorcerer Asteroth." Oh come on!  
Bookman: But where are the words of the spell? I assumed they were in your half of the book!  
Twilight: And we assumed they were in yours.  
Bookman: Once again, a dead end. I shall never know the secret.

(Doug looks at the book with Twilight and finds a picture of a wizard with several animals.)

Doug: There's Asteroth, and that must be his star. Too bad it's so small, or else we could just read the writing.  
Chris: But why the animals?  
Bookman: Towards the end of his life, Asteroth kept animals in cages and searched for the spells that would make them more like humans. The legend is that finally the animals revolted against the experiment, killed Asteroth, and stole many of his powers.  
Amalthea: Including the star with the spell on it.  
Bookman: Possibly. They found a ship, sailed away, and were never seen again. However, there is a final notation in my half of the book talking about a shipwrecked man found after several weeks, half mad with thirst and exposure to the sun. Before he died, he swore he saw an island ruled by animals.  
Doug: Where?  
Bookman: There is, I regret to say, no such place. I looked for it on every chart I could, but the Isle of Naboombu does not exist.

(Applebloom looks down at her book and sees the title. "The Isle of Naboombu".)

Applebloom: Oh, it does too! Mr. Brown gave me a-

(Rob covers her mouth.)

Bookman: What did she say?!  
Rob: Nothing. She's just being a silly little kid.  
Bookman: I wish the child to speak!

(Rob removes his hand.)

Rob: Now you've done it.  
Applebloom: It's in this book, Mr. Brown gave me. It's got some real purdy pictures.  
John (quickly): You wouldn't be interested, Bookman. It's just a silly children's book.  
Bookman: I'll be the judge of that. Give me the book.  
Applebloom: No.  
Bookman: Please don't annoy me. Give me the book, girl.  
Applebloom: Make me.

(Swigburn comes up with his Switchblade as Amalthea teleports them back to John's house.)

Twilight: Well that's it. All we have to do is go to the Isle of Naboombu! Then we can get the spell and give it to Princess Celestia and Princess Luna!  
Amalthea: We should be careful though. Those animals are savage and cutthroat, not like my daughters.  
Rainbow Dash: You sound like you know them.  
Amalthea: I helped save them from Asteroth, and when he tried to capture me, I fought back, and he was killed in the struggle. All but a few ponies and Pegasai simply went their own way, stealing Asteroth's belongings with them.  
Applebloom: Whoo-hoo! We're gonna get the thing!  
Sweetie Belle: Hooray!

(They're teleported to the beach of Naboombu as they look around.)

Rarity: No one's here!  
Voice: People?! Oh no! What scurvy luck!

(They turn to see a bear in a sailor's suit.)

Rarity: ... Is that a bear in a sailor's suit?  
John: Yup.  
Rarity: Okay, good. For a moment I thought I lost my mind.

(The bear advances.)

To Be Continued...


	3. A New World Part 3

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 3: A New World Part 3

(It opens right after the last episode as they stare at the bear.)

John: Leave this to me. I'll use the old John Brown method.  
Doug: What's that?

(John goes up to the bear.)

John: Good day to you sir. I see you're a fellow sailor. I used to sail with her majesty's navy for-  
Bear: Stow it, mate!

(The bear knocks John aside as he shoves them all to a sign.)

Bear: Can't none of you read reading?!  
Rarity: Okay, first of all, sir, it's "Can't _any_ of you read _writing_?" If you're going to insult us, do it properly. Second, I resent your claim that we're all illiterate.  
Bear: Duh... Anyway, it says "No Peopling allowed!"  
Doug: Peopling? Is that even a word?  
Bear: It means I gotta... Th-throw you all back!  
Applebloom: Hey wait a minute! Anyone can see the King of Naboombu, and that's the law!  
Bear: Where'd you hear that?  
Applebloom: It's here in my book.

(Applebloom shows the bear the book.)

Bear: So it do.  
Rarity: Does.  
Rob: Rarity, the... Giant... Talking... Bear... Oh dear lord, I just said that out loud. Anyway, he's threatening to toss us into the ocean! Stop correcting his grammar!  
Bear: Well if you people knew what was good for ya, ya'd get yourselves thrown back. The king don't like people!  
Twilight: Well that's lucky, 'cause we're not actually people. We're ponies that are magically disguised as people.

(Rainbow Dash nods when her wings suddenly appear.)

Rainbow Dash: My wings! My beautiful wings!

(Rainbow Dash flies around.)

Rarity: Well why didn't you do that sooner?! Like when that Swigburn man was brandishing a knife!  
Rainbow Dash: I didn't know I could.  
Amalthea: The magic in this place is stronger than the rest of the world, so our strength with it is greater.  
Fluttershy: Yeah, um, anyway, so could you take us to the king?  
Bear: Well alright, but don't say I didn't warn ya.

(Cut to a tent bellowing in and out.)

King (pirate voice): GET OUT OF HERE!

(A tiger flies out and dusts himself off when he notices the bear.)

Tiger (Tony Jay-like): You, sailor, what are these people, doing on Naboombu?  
Bear: They appeared on the beach and wanna see the king, and four of 'em have wings like hawks.

(The tiger observes Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo, Fluttershy, and Twilight's wings.)

Tiger: Indeed. However, the king is in no mood to play diplomat, so just throw them into the sea as usual.  
Bear: Aye-aye, sir.  
John: Whoa, wait! As a performer, I'm not without talents. Perhaps I could cheer him up in return for us staying long enough to just build a boat and leave like that?  
Tiger: A good bargain, but I'm afraid his majesty is not simply in a foul mood. You see, his majesty fancies himself as the world's greatest football player, however, due to an... Accident with our referee, the Royal Cup Match cannot take place today. Now...  
John: Wait, I can still help. I can referee.  
Tiger: Indeed?  
John: Yes sir. I was captain of my college team in 2012.  
Tiger: Well, I'll see if he'll at least humor the idea.

(He goes in.)

King: NOW WHAT?!

(He listens and actually begins laughing before coming out. He's a lion with a crown and the Star of Asteroth around his neck.)

King: Har-har, can't tell ye how much I appreciate this offer, boyo. For some reason, we have difficulty keeping referees for more than a game or two. If there be one thing we like, it's volunteers. Eh, Khan?  
Khan: Yes.  
John: Well, let's get that game ready, your highness.

(John walks off with the two.)

Rarity: You know I've got to admit that in many respects, John Brown is a pretty brave man.  
Applebloom: Yeah, and what's a football game?  
Chris: Oh it's-  
Doug: From the way they're talking, it's a game that's also called Soccer. The goal is to kick the ball into the opponents net.  
Applebloom: Oh...  
Discord: Plus, the sly old dog is in a position to grab the Star off the king without him realizing it.  
Pinkie: Hooray!

(Cut to just before the game as John looks at the star.)

John: What a magnificent ornament, sire.  
King: Aye. Wouldn't be without it. Been in the family for generations.

(Cut to the stands as Khan leads the gang to a large box.)

Khan: The King has given you permission to sit in his royal box, do try not to make a mess of it.  
Applejack: Uh... Alright.

(Cut to the field as the game commences. The King's team is made of carnivorous animals while the other team is made of herbivores.)

John: Right then, let's have a nice clean game.

(He blows the whistle, and all at once, everyone tramples him to get the ball.)

Fluttershy: Oh my, that can't have felt good.

(Eventually, the ball goes to an ostrich that continually kicks it around.)

Scootaloo: Hurry up and get rid of it, you idiot!

(They trample the bird.)

Chris: Oh, well you did tell him so.

(Eventually, the ball lands on a rhino's horn, popping and blowing all over the place.)

King: STOP THAT BALL!

(The king's bellow sends everyone into the herbivore's goal, as the King sees the ball and blows it in as well.)

King: Har-har. Game's over. I win.  
John (exhausted): Okay...

(Cut to later as John gets his jacket back on.)

John: Oh, your highness let me help you into your robe.  
King: Why thank you.  
John: So, you ever heard of something called the Gypsy Switch?  
King: Why no.

(The king turns around the reveal John's referee whistle.)

King: Can't say that I have.  
John: Remind me to tell you about it, sometime.

(John holds his hand behind his back to reveal the Star.)

John: I can't tell you how pleased I was to make your acquaintance.  
Twilight: Yeah, sir, but I think we better get going back home.  
King: Aye. You're a friendly lot, and I don't mind ye visiting, but I wouldn't want ye living here.  
Rarity: Quite right, sire. Well, bye.

(They head off as Khan notices the whistle.)

Khan: Sir, would you mind if I pointed something out.  
King: What?  
Khan: It appears that Mr. Brown has stolen your Star and replaced it with a whistle.

(The King looks and roars as he rushes after them. Cut to the others as they get to the beach.)

Twilight: We have it. The star! Now we just need to figure out the spell, and we can get home!  
Doug: Let's practice this thing in my place. It'll be safe enough there.

(The King charges.)

Sweetie Belle: AH! What do we do?!  
Doug: I've got an idea! Twilight, you still got that book?!  
Twilight: Yeah.  
Doug: Give the first half to me!

(Twilight does so as Doug skims through a few pages.)

Doug: Got it! (To the King) Filigree apogee pedigree pillogee!

(The King turns into a rabbit.)

Doug: Holy cow, it worked. I was totally winging it... Uh... We might wanna leave before that spell wears off.  
Twilight: Right.

(They teleport back to Doug's apartment.)

Twilight: Okay, now the Star.

(Doug tosses it to her as she reads it.)

Twilight: Perfect! Okay, I need some shoes.

(Doug puts down some work shoes.)

Twilight: Okay, here goes. Treguna mekoides trecorum satis dee.

(Nothing happens.)

Sweetie Belle: Nothing happened!  
Twilight: Hm, could I be doing something wrong?  
Doug: Well maybe you could jazz it up a little. Like what John said back in London. "Do it with a flair".  
Rob (groaning): That means do it as a song doesn't it?  
Doug: Yup, now come on guys, we need all the help we can get.  
Everyone (chanting): Treguna mekoides trecorum satis dee.  
Treguna mekoides trecorum satis dee.  
Twilight: _Substitutiary Locomotion!  
Mystic Power that's far beyond the wildest notion!  
It's so weird! So feared! And yet wonderful to see!  
Substitutiary Locomotion come to me!  
_Doug: Shh! Now.  
Twilight: Treguna mekoides trecorum satis dee.

(The shoes begin moving on their own.)

Applebloom: Cool!

(Everyone joins in the shoes dance as it's joined by Doug's other shoes, and his jacket. And a woman's gown, which begins dancing with John.)

Rarity: That's the gown I bought in London!  
John: Really? It dances divinely.  
Twilight: Okay, this is seriously out of control!  
Applejack: Well what are we supposed to do about it?!  
Doug: Maybe the book has an All Purpose Cut-Off Spell. I hear about that sort of thing in loads of fantasies and the like.

(Twilight goes and finds the spell.)

Twilight: Got it. Finite Incantatum!

(The objects stop moving.)

Twilight: Phew. Okay, practice time.

(Cut to an hour or so later as Twilight's finally mastered the spell.)

Twilight: Phew. Now we can go back home and... And say good-bye to you guys.  
Rob: Well, it was pretty fun, though it felt like I was stuck in a 60s Disney Movie.  
Pinkie: Oh... Oh...

(Pinkie hugs the four good-bye as she cries.)

Chris: Oh, Pinkie, don't cry! 'Cause that'll make me- WHAHH!  
Rob: Air! Need Air!

(Doug manages to get her off.)

Twilight: Hey you guys... Thanks.  
Doug: Anytime.  
Fluttershy: Rob, I just wanted to thank you for going along with all this. I know you didn't really believe it until we got to that zoo.  
Rob: Hey, it was nothing.  
Applejack: Well, so long, partners.  
Chris (squeaky): Yeah.

(The girls open the portal and are about to go through when Discord smirks and snaps his fingers as the boys are flung through as well. Cut to Equestria as everyone arrives. The girls and Discord are back to normal as the boys now look like Ponies. Doug's a white Alicorn with a black mane. Rob is a green and scaly Pegasus with dragon forelegs with a brown mane. Chris is a red pony with a sandy brown mane. John is a black unicorn with a brown mane.)

Rob: What the-?! What just happened?!  
Discord: Oh, I figured I'd follow that old proverb. "One should never break up a winning team."  
Rob: You jerk!

(Rob's about to charge when Discord snaps his fingers and disappears.)

Doug: Hey, look.

(Everyone turns to see a winged version of Amalthea's unicorn form as Luna and Celestia get a good look at her.)

Celestia & Luna: Mother?  
Amalthea: My little foals, you do not know how long I have prayed for this day.

(The family reunites.)

Doug: Aw, cute!  
Chris: Yeah.  
Applejack: Uh, maybe we should focus on the Changelings that are supposed to be coming!  
Twilight: Oh, right! Treguna mekoides trecorum satis dee.

(All the unused suits of armor come to life and go to the guards, just as the Changelings arrive.)

Doug: Whoo! This is gonna be awesome!  
Rainbow Dash: Yeah! We finally get to do some butt kicking!

(They all head off, except Fluttershy, who stays a little back.)

Fluttershy: Oh my.

(She nervously goes forward as the suits of armor assist the soldiers and the gang, not being tricked by the Changelings' disguises until they're stopped. After that, Amalthea, Celestia, and Luna fly down.)

Amalthea: Well done. All of you.  
Rob: Yeah, yeah, now about getting us back home!  
Celestia: We cannot do that. It takes too much time and energy to do it again.  
Luna: In other words, you're stuck.  
Amalthea: I think I shall make my first royal degree in a long while. I, Queen Amalthea, do hereby charge Princess Twilight Sparkle with the task of researching the book known as the Spells of Asteroth until a new and simpler method of portal spells can be found. Also, Douglas Halbeisen, Robert Bugie, Christopher Mccool, and Jonathan Brown shall serve as Twilight's bodyguards, in addition to the book, staying in Ponyville during the interval.  
Doug: Whoo! We get to spend time in a magical land!  
Rob: Oh jeez, it's so girly, I'm gonna throw up!  
Chris: No way! This is awesome!  
John: I say, it makes no difference to me, but I do fancy the idea of seeing what this world has to offer.  
Pinkie: YAY!

(Cut to Ponyville as they arrive at an old building.)

Applejack: This here building hasn't been used in years, but it should make a good home for y'all after we fix it up.

(Spike comes up and waves.)

Spike: Guys!

(He stops at Rob.)

Spike: Who are you?  
Rob: My name's Rob. I'm a temporary resident.  
Spike: Cool! It's like having a brother!  
Rob: ... Eh. I can see that.

(Everyone gets to work on the building.)

The End.


	4. New Home

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 4: New Home

(It opens in the renovated building as the four each make one quarter of the two story building their own. Doug wakes up and jumps around.)

Doug: Oh boy!

(He rushes into Rob's room.)

Doug: Rob! Rob, wake up! Rainbow Dash is gonna teach us how to fly!  
Rob: Urgh. Sleep now. Fly later.

(Doug grabs Rob's sleeping bag and drags Rob to the middle of town where Rainbow Dash is.) 

Rainbow Dash: Um… Why's Rob in a sleeping bag?

Doug: I couldn't figure out how to unzip him.

Rainbow Dash: Hey, Rob, wake up. It's time to learn how to fly.

Rob: I don't wanna fly.

(Rainbow Dash rips the sleeping bag open and gets Rob up.)

Doug: I can't believe I'm gonna fly! I'm so excited I could...

(He takes a deep breath before Rob cuts in.)

Rob: Stop it. Stop it. You're not gonna do a song while I'm here.  
Doug: Aw. How come you get to make the decisions?  
Rob: Because I'm the only one smart enough to have thumbs!

(He extends his two thumbs.)

Rob: Yeah!

(He moves his head forward, jabbing a thumb into his eye.)

Rob: AH! MY EYE!  
Rainbow Dash: Anyway... You two ready to learn how to fly from the best flyer in Equestria?!  
Doug: Yes sir! ... Ma'am... Ma'am-sir.  
Rainbow Dash: Okay, first off, flap your wings.

(They do so as they fly around.)

Rainbow Dash: Remember! Don't stop flapping until you ride the wind!  
Doug: Okay!

(Doug glides for a bit before he ends up in a cloud.)

Doug: Wow, it's wet in here.

(Doug emerges and shakes himself dry.)

Rainbow Dash: Okay Rob, show me what you've got.

(Rob flies up and then flies back down.)

Rainbow Dash: Alright boys, not too bad. Now I've got weather stuff to do.  
Doug: Later! Ooh! Now I've got my magic lesson with Twilight!

(He goes to the library and knocks as Fluffy comes up.)

Doug: Oh hey, girl. Do you like it here so far?

(Fluffy barks happily. Twilight opens the door.)

Twilight: Hey Doug. I figured we'd start with something simple. Teleporting. Just think of somewhere close by and use your magic to teleport there.

(Doug closes his eyes as his horn glows blue, and he ends up on the ceiling.)

Doug: Cool!

(Fluffy barks happily as he reaches up before he smells Owlowiscious and goes to him and barks at her as she keeps to the ceiling.)

Fluffy: Ruff! Ruff!  
Doug: Fluffy, Fluffy, come here, girl.

(Doug flies back down as Fluffy comes up and pants.)

Doug: Good girl.

(Cut to later as John's got a stage set up near Town Hall as Rarity arrives.)

Rarity: I do hope you're not going to pull the stuff you pulled in London.  
John: Of course not my dear pony.

(John puts on a magician's outfit.)

John: And now, for the show. Ladies and gentlemen, note the name John Brown. I am here to divert and amuse.

(John makes his horn glow as a bushel of flowers appears out of nowhere and goes to Rarity.)

John: And so, for my first feat of magic, I'm going to need two volunteers.  
Pinkie: Ooh! Ooh! John! John! Pick me! Pick me!  
John: Alright, Pinkie, and let's have Applejack as well.

(The two walk up.)

Applejack: I got a bad feeling about this.  
John: No need to worry at all my dears. Now, behold this piñata.

(He brings out a giant dragon piñata.)

Applejack: Whoa Nellie!  
John: And now, I will go inside the piñata while you two are blindfolded and wave these flaming torches around trying to hit it.  
Pinkie: What?! But what if we hit you?  
John: Well no one really cares for a strike out, do they?

(Sweetie Belle blindfolds Applejack and Pinkie as they look around with the torches and accidentally hit it, as it explodes and all that comes out is candy as they remove their blindfolds.)

Pinkie: Ooh, candy!

(Pinkie eats some.)

Applejack: But where's John?

(John walks from behind the crowd and removes his hat as he bows.)

John: Lovely work you two.  
Pinkie: Wow. Now that's what I call doing it with a flair!  
John: Indeed. Now, I just need to find where Chris disappeared to. He was supposed to be my assistant.

(Cut to Chris as he's trotting along as he meets up with Fluttershy.)

Chris: Hi Fluttershy! Isn't this a great day?! I can't wait to tell everybody back home about it!  
Fluttershy: Uh... Chris, wouldn't they think you're insane?  
Chris: ... Oh yeah. Oh well! Hey where are Doug and Rob?

(They land on the ground with Rainbow Dash.)

Rainbow Dash: Wow, great moves guys! Especially you, Doug.  
Doug: Thanks. I've wanted to fly all my life.  
Rainbow Dash (smiling): Cool.  
Fluttershy: Hey Rob. How do you like it here?  
Rob: It's alright.  
Fluttershy: Oh, I'm glad to hear it.

(Everyone talks a little.)

The End.


	5. Storytime I: Pied Piper

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 5: Storytime I: Pied Piper

(It opens at the guys' place as the Cutie Mark Crusaders come up.)

Applebloom: Don't worry, Cutie Mark Crusaders. I'm sure Doug'll do it!  
Sweetie Belle: Hooray.

(They knock on the door as Rob comes up.)

Rob: What?  
Applebloom: Is Doug here? We wanna talk to him.

(Doug comes up.)

Doug: Hey girls. What's up?  
Applebloom: We heard from Chris that you like tellin' stories, and we were wonderin' if you'd like to tell one to our class.  
Doug: I'd love to. I'll be there... Um...  
Sweetie Belle: Tomorrow.  
Doug: Okay, that sounds fair. I've heard a load of stories in my time, so I'm sure I can think of one to tell.

(Cut to that day at school.)

Cherilee: Class, today, we're going to hear a story about honesty from a newcomer to Ponyville. Doug.

(Doug comes in.)

Doug: Hey everypony.  
Foals: Hey Doug!  
Doug: Okay. This is a story I've heard and re-heard all the time when I was your age, so I figured why not tell it now. You see, back where I come from, there was a place called Hamelin. You see, a very long time ago, the Town of Hamelin had a serious rat problem. But the real rats in town weren't vermin. They were the town officials themselves.  
Sweetie Belle: Wow, really?  
Doug: Yup. You see...

(Fade to a German village with the Ponies inhabiting it.)

Doug (narrating): They made lots of promises and broke them all.

(Cut to a very uneven road.)

Doug: They promised to repair the broken cobblestones on the streets.

(Cut to a barren town square.)

Doug: Plant flowers in the town square.

(Cut to a rundown school room.)

Doug: Buy books for the school houses.

(Cut to a gap between the town and the mainland.)

Doug: Build a bridge over the river.

(Cut to Princess Platinum with Commander Hurricane and Chancellor Pudding Head.)

Doug: Of course, to do these wonderful things, the council needed to have meetings. Lunch meetings. Dinner meetings. These fat cat ponies spent so much on themselves that there was nothing left for the town, so they raised the taxes, but they also raised their salaries too. Soon enough there was no more money left to keep their promises at all, but that didn't stop them from making more promises that sounded so good, that the townsfolk never caught on... Until the rats came.

(Several rats arrive.)

Doug: At first, there were only a few rats. The council promised to buy traps to catch them, but instead they bought another dinner, and the rats, seeing that there were no traps, went and got their friends who got their friends, and soon it wasn't just a rat here and there. There were rats everywhere, and when it looked like the rats would take over the town, the villagers had a meeting of their own.

(Cut to Town Hall as Smart Cookie is in front of the Council.)

Smart Cookie: While you lazy as all get out "leaders" have been stuffing your faces and getting hooficures, the rats have been frightening our foals, cleaning out our cupboards, and nesting in our beds! The citizens of Hamelin have had enough! If you don't get rid of all them rats by tomorrow, we're getting rid of y'all!  
Platinum: My dear Smart Cookie, please be reasonable. There are so many rats, and so little time. We'll need at least a few weeks.  
Smart Cookie: You had too much time already! You're only getting one more day!  
Platinum: Oh dear.

(The filly Rarity arrives with a baby Sweetie Belle on her back.)

Rarity: Mummy, are you finished working? Can you go on that picnic with me and Sweetie Belle now?  
Sweetie Belle: Mama.  
Platinum: Oh sorry dears. Mummy has to deal with these rats. Maybe tomorrow.  
Rarity: But you're always saying that! Please Mummy, you promised!

(Filly Rainbow Dash with baby Scootaloo goes to Hurricane.)

Rainbow Dash: Mom, Mom, can you go fishing with us now, like you said?  
Hurricane: Sorry kiddo. I've still gotta deal with those rats. Tomorrow for sure.  
Rainbow Dash: But you said that yesterday!

(Filly Pinkie Pie hops up.)

Pinkie: Mommy! Mommy! There are colors in the sky!  
Pudding Head: That's a Rainbow.  
Pinkie: Oh Amalthea, it has a name!  
Pudding Head: Yeah, and there's a pot of gold at the end!  
Pinkie: Ooh! Ooh! Can you take me there Mommy?! Please, please, PLEASE!  
Pudding Head: Sorry honey. I gotta figure out how to get rid of all these yucky rats.  
Pinkie: Oh... Okay.  
Pudding Head: But the next time there's a rainbow, I promise we'll look at it together.  
Pinkie: ... You always say that...  
Platinum: Look children, we'll all keep our promises, but right now we've got work to do.

(The fillies walk sadly off as Smart Cookie, Filly Applejack, and baby Applebloom go to them.)

Smart Cookie: Well, I'll at least give y'all some fresh air away from these pesky rats.  
Applejack: Yeah, that's what friends are for.  
Applebloom: Fwends!  
Scootaloo: Mm...

(They head off with Cloven, Twilight, Pansy, and Fluttershy.)

Fluttershy: Oh, I hope we don't step on any of the rats.  
Twilight: I'm sure we won't.

(Pansy shrieks and jumps on top of Smart Cookie as a rat scurries past.)

Smart Cookie: This is gonna be a long... Day.

(They watch their children head off.)

Platinum: Come on all, we need to make a meeting to get rid of these rats, or we'll lose our jobs!

(Cut to the council chamber as they all talk.)

Hurricane: I say we set traps at once!  
Platinum: Oh, it's too late for that Commander Hurricane. There aren't enough traps in this whole country to catch all these rats.  
Pudding Head: Ooh! Maybe we could bring in some rat specialists!  
Platinum: No time Chancellor Pudding Head. They'd have to do a study, write a report. It would take months, even if we could afford their fee. Which reminds me, how much money do we have?  
Pudding Head: I'll have to check our money bags.

(Pudding Head comes back with two bags of coins and empties them, revealing fifty gold bits, twenty silver ones, and seventy bronze bits.)

Platinum: That's all?! That's barely a hundred gold bits. It's over! We're done for!

(Platinum begins crying as the door opens, and Luna arrives.)

Luna: Excuse me your honors, I heard you have a rat problem. Perhaps I could help.  
Platinum: Then by all means come in, and who might you be? You don't look much like a rat catcher or a scientist.  
Luna: I am known as the pied piper. My music weaves a strange spell on those who hear it. No creature can resist it. I have freed many a town from many a pest, and for the right price, I'll be happy to make short work of your rats as well.  
Pudding Head: How short? Can you get rid of 'em in a day?  
Luna: In an hour.  
Hurricane: And what is the right price?  
Luna: A hundred gold pieces, which judging by your silverware, you can easily afford.  
Platinum: Will you excuse us, so we can discuss it?  
Luna: Of course.

(Luna walks a little ways off as Platinum goes to the others.)

Hurricane: We can't pay him that! It'll clean out the town chest!  
Pudding Head: We're wasting time! We should send him packing!  
Platinum: And I say we agree to his bargain. That silly pipe of his won't rid this town of one rat, let alone a thousand, but it will give us someone else to blame for our failure. When the piper isn't able to draw the rats away, we can say that the piper broke his promise, giving us more time to come up with a solution.

(They agree, and Platinum goes to Luna.)

Platinum: It's a deal, but you must get rid of every last rat. If you do, you shall have your money.  
Luna: Best start counting it then, because I'll soon hold up my end of this bargain.

(Luna begins playing an upbeat tune on her pipe as the rats begin following her out of the town. Cut to the stream as the fillies are fishing.)

Rarity: I wish Mummy was here.

(The music reaches the stream.)

Cloven: What in the name of Amalthea is that?

(They see Luna arrive and fly over the river as the rats swim over as the council comes and stares.)

Pinkie (giggling): Look Mommy, the rats are going swimming!

(The rats then sink from exhaustion as Luna gets back to the shore.)

Pudding Head: Ooh, it looks like the rats are sunk.  
Hurricane: And so are we. Looks like we're gonna have to pay the piper after all.

(Cut to Town Hall as everyone is there.)

Smart Cookie: Well slap my flank, ya did it.  
Luna: Actually, I did it, and now I'd like my reward.  
Platinum: Here you go my dear pony.

(Platinum hands Luna a small amount of gold.)

Luna: Only twenty gold bits?! Our bargain was for a hundred!  
Platinum: Oh, you weren't serious, were you? I mean, no one pays a hundred gold bits just for piping a tune. After all, it's me and my friends' job to guard our good people's money. Now what kind of leader would I be if I paid you a fee like that?  
Luna: An honest one! Which you are obviously not!  
Pansy: Well, um... Y-you did promise her-  
Hurricane: What are you saying, Private?! You want us to plunge the whole town into a depression?!  
Pansy: Oh, well no.  
Luna: But I ask you, is it honest for this council to make a promise and then break it!  
Rarity: No ma'am, but you see, they always do that.

(Luna looks sadly at all the children.)

Luna: It is up to you good townspeople to make sure your leaders keep their promises, and it's obvious to me that you're either too brow beaten or lazy to do so!  
Smart Cookie: Hey, I resent that!  
Luna: Even those who are a bit more strong-willed have to face the music with their fellows, for this.  
Hurricane: Ah, you're only bluffing! It's not like you can pipe the rats back out of the river! Now get out!  
Luna: You-you...  
Smart Cookie: Oh, now ya've done it.  
Luna: YOU'RE DISHONEST AND UNGRATEFUL! AND IT REALLY IS A SHAME THAT THE CHILDREN OF THIS VILLAGE SHOULD GROW UP TO BE THE SAME! I'll save the children from such a fate. I'll pipe them away before it's too late.

(She begins playing a lovely soothing tune as she heads off as Rarity and Sweetie Belle follow.)

Cloven: Your highness, your daughters are following the piper.  
Platinum: What of it? Rarity and Sweetie Belle always had a taste for music. I'm sure they'll turn back in a minute.

(The other fillies and colts follow the piper.)

Smart Cookie: What the-? All the other foals are following her too.  
Platinum: After them!

(They all follow the children as Luna leads them to a mountain range.)

Platinum: Children, stop!  
Pudding Head: She's not going to drown them like she did the rats, is she?  
Hurricane: No, look! She's leading them to that mountain!  
Smart Cookie: That place aint got no trail. It's sheer rock.  
Platinum: You're right. They'll have to turn back. The game is up.

(Suddenly, the rock face opens up, and the children all pass through it into what looks like the Chocolate Room from Willie Wonka's Factory.)

Platinum: Children, come back! COME BACK!

(The only one not to get through is a little crippled colt who couldn't keep up, and he begins crying.)

Platinum: Where's the piper? Where are our children?! Why did they follow her?  
Colt: Her music promised she would take us to a wonderful place where no one was ever sick or lame anymore, and the breeze is always gentle, but I couldn't keep up, and now I fear I'll never get there.

(Suddenly, the entrance opens a crack as the music resumes, and the child rushes in before it slams shut as Platinum claws at it with her hoofs.)

Platinum: Wait, no! Please, if you just give me my children back, I'll give you anything you want! All the money in the treasury! Everything I own! Just please give me my daughters back! PLEASE!  
Smart Cookie: Your highness, I... I don't think she believes you this time.

(Platinum looks down as a voice echoes from the mountain.)

Luna (VO): This is my promise. I will return someday with the children. If you have the one hundred gold bits you promised me, you will have them back for good.

Platinum: Oh, yes! Yes, I promise we'll have them! And… And Smart Cookie will be our treasurer to make sure we don't spend it on anything but that!

(Cut back to the school.)

Doug: I bet that council wishes they were more honest with their children and the piper in the first place.  
Applebloom: Aw... That's so sad. Those poor ponies. All because that council was a bunch of jerks.

Sweetie Belle: At least they'll get their kids back someday.  
Doug: Yup.

(Doug smiles as he talks with the kids about the story when his Cutie Mark, an open storybook, appears.)

The End.


	6. Manlivity

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 6: Manlivity

(It opens as Rob is walking around when he hears something at the library. He goes in as Doug and Twilight are reorganizing the books to make room for The Spells of Asteroth.)

Doug: Hey, look!

(Doug uses the red books to make a heart shape on the wall.)

Doug: Cool!

(Rob groans agitatedly.)

Rob: Dude, what has happened to your manlitude?!  
Doug: ... Is that even a word?

(Rob groans and goes out.)

Twilight: Uh... Doug, no offense, but you kinda screwed up on one of the shelves.  
Doug: What do you mean? All those books belong there.  
Twilight: Yes, but the shelf isn't alphabetical.  
Doug: Oh geez. Do you always have to make the calls?  
Twilight: Well this is my home.  
Doug: Well excuse me, Princess!

(The two growl at each other. Cut to Rob going to Carousel Boutique as he opens the door.)

Rarity: Oh Rob, darling, how are you? I was just fitting John with a new outfit for his magic show this evening.

(John looks like the magician from King of the Hill.)

John: Hey.

(Rob can only groan again and walks out.)

John: Does it have to be so frilly.  
Rarity: Well as you always say, John. "Do it with a flair."  
John: Yes, but this might be overdoing it.  
Rarity: Oh, I didn't know a crook from London knew so much about fashion, what with your usual attire.  
John: Oh, well it's kinda hard when you've only had enough to buy proper food with what I lived on before coming here!

(They end up arguing too. Cut to Sugar Cube Corner as Rob comes in to find Pinkie and Chris playing dolls with the Cake twins.)

Chris: Aw, they are so cute. Oh, hi Rob.  
Rob: Oh my god, where are all the men?!  
Chris: Stallions.

(Rob blows smoke from his nostrils.)

Rob: Don't.  
Pinkie: Oh, sorry Rob. There's no smoking in Sugar Cube Corner.

(Rob shouts and goes off grumbling.)

Pinkie: Okay, now what?

(The twins giggle as Pumpkin Cake's horn glows.)

Pinkie: Uh-oh.  
Chris: What?

(Cut to the house shaking up and down. Cut to Rob as he's groaning.)

Rob: Argh, what's with this place?! It's too froo-froo! Too... It's too...  
_It's just too girly here.  
It's too peaceful and paradise like.  
Straight and narrow and much too nice like.  
Endlessly sunny and clear...  
It's just too girly here.  
It's too blissful to bear.  
Calm and quiet, and much to mellow.  
All my brain cells have turned to Jell-o.  
Everyday feels like a year...  
It's just too girly here...  
I need some action! I need some juice!  
That crazy kinda feeling of playing fast and loose.  
Some razzle dazzle, and a little stress and strife.  
I've gotta get some life in my life!  
But it's just too girly here.  
There's no where you can be a tough guy.  
Problems come, just write and then dye.  
It's so legit and sincere...  
It's just too girly here...  
What good's a young man, without a some clam!  
I'm wasted talent, that's all that I am!  
But this operator is at the wrong address!  
'Cause there's no one to talk Batman, and no one to talk brass...  
_  
(He walks to Sweet Apple Acres as Applejack and Applebloom are working together.)

Applejack: _It's so heavenly here.  
Pure and perfect. So bright and shining.  
Every cloud has a silver lining._

(Rainbow Dash moves some clouds away to give them more light.)

Rainbow Dash: _Everyone's full of good cheer.  
_Applebloom: _It's so heavenly here..._  
Rob: _They're all so girly! I just can't relate!  
There's gotta be an exit through the pearly gate!  
Behold the big guy who's been cut down in his prime.  
I may have done the crime, but I can't do the time!  
'Cause it's just too girly here!  
All babysitting and rearranging.  
It could send anyone careening!  
I'm going out of my head!  
This joint is deader than dead!  
I'll give you eight to three!  
It's just too girly...!  
Just too girly... Here . . .!_

(Spike comes up.)

Spike: Wow Rob, excellent music number.  
Rob: Oh man, it's getting to me! What do I do, Spike?!  
Spike: I think it's just your approach. Try being manly, but in a sensitive way, and you'll fit in fine. Show... Manlivity! Yeah, I just made up that word. Manlivity.  
Rob: Well... Maybe...

(Fluttershy comes up.)

Fluttershy: Oh Rob, I'm so happy to see you. I need your help. Angel Bunny's gone missing.  
Rob (sighing): Sure.

(Rob looks around and finds Angel in a hole.)

Rob: Okay, time to Manlivity it up! Alright Angel Bunny, get on out of that hole right now before I smoke you out with my fire breath! Trust me, I can do that.

(Angel shakes his head and makes motions, showing that he wants Rob to ask him nicely.)

Rob: Argh! How could such a nice caring person like Fluttershy have a jerky pet like you?! Fine. Will you come out?

(Angel gestures for more.)

Rob: ... Will you... Please... Come out.

(Angel comes out as Fluttershy hugs both of them.)

Fluttershy: Oh thanks, Rob. I was so worried for Angel.

(Fluttershy goes off.)

Rob: Alright then... LET'S GET GOING!

(Rob's standing behind an anime background as it zooms out to reveal Spike holding it up.)

Rob: Thanks Spike. I'll see you at the magic show.

(Rob flies off.)

Fluttershy: What the heck was that?  
Spike: You know, I don't really know.

(Cut to Sugar Cube Corner as Rob arrives and sees Pinkie and Chris running after the Cake Twins as Rob comes up.)

Rob: Let's Manlivity it up!

(Rob comes up to the twins as they look at Rob.)

Rob: Hey kids, how about Uncle Rob shows you a new game?

(The babies giggle and go outside as Rob places a plastic ball with several holes in it on top of a tee.)

Rob: Whiffleball! Now, just hit the ball with the bat.

(Pound Cake pounds on the tee as the ball falls off and Rob helps him make a run.)

Rob: Yay, for Pound Cake!  
Pound Cake: Yay!  
Pumpkin Cake: Me twy.

(Pumpkin Cake knocks the ball off and does a run.)

Rob: Yay for Pumpkin Cake!  
Cake Twins: Yay!

(Cut to inside as Pinkie and Chris manage to fix the place up and sigh.)

Pinkie: Oh thanks. I don't know what would've happened if you hadn't shown up, Rob.  
Rob: No problem.

(Cut to Carousel Boutique as Rarity and John are arguing when Sweetie Belle answers the door.)

Sweetie Belle: Hi Rob. I'm glad you're here. They won't stop arguing about John's outfit for tonight.  
Rob: It's time to Manlivity it up!  
Sweetie Belle: Is that a real word?  
Rob: No. Spike made it up.

(Rob goes and does a quick redesign of the outfit that does away with the frills and adds gems instead.)

Rarity: Oh, you know what Rob, darling, I think that just might work.  
John: Jolly good there, Rob.  
Rob: Thanks.

(Cut to the library as Rob answers the door and Doug and Twilight are arguing incoherently about organization.)

Rob: Okay, what's the problem?  
Doug: Twilight doesn't seem to appreciate me helping reorganize her books.  
Twilight: I appreciate that. It's just that you were doing it wrong!  
Rob: Come on guys, let's just calm down and get these books up, in their right shelves and alphabetized. BUT IN A TOTALLY MANLIVITY WAY!  
Doug: You know, if I didn't know there were no TVs here, I'd swear you just saw a lot of anime recently.

(They reorganize the books, making the heart, a star, and a fire shape.)

Doug: Cool, and sorry about being so short, Twilight. This is your home after all.  
Twilight: Oh, you were just helping.

(Rob walks off as his Cutie Mark, a peace sign appears. Cut to that night at the magic show as John levitates himself down in the outfit Rarity and Rob designed.)

John: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen! Now for my first trick, I shall need a volunteer from the audience!  
Rob: Eh, I'll do it.  
John: Good. Now just lay down on this box, please.  
Rob: Okay.

(Rob goes in as John conjures up a blade and sets it through the box. John then pulls the two halves apart, revealing he's cut Rob in half.)

Rob: Oh come on, those are fake legs. Watch, I'll move mine, wherever they are.

(Rob wiggles his legs as his legs wiggle in the other box.)

Rob: Wait, those legs are moving, so they're my... My... AHHHHHH! AHHHHHHH! AHHHHH!

(Rob passes out. Cut to later as he comes to on the ground and whole as everyone comes up.)

Rarity: I say Rob, are you alright? You were screaming like a banshee.  
Rob: Oh, yeah. I'm fine. Just playing it up for the crowd.  
John: Well, you did a good job of it. Here's two bits for your troubles. Now let's head off.  
Rob: Right.

(Rob walks with the others, uttering an ow with every step.)

The End.


	7. Looking For a Purpose

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 7: Looking For a Purpose

(It opens as Chris is walking around Ponyville for something to do.)

Chris: There's gotta be something for me to do.

(He goes to Sweet Apple Acres and goes up to Applejack as she, Big Macintosh, and Applebloom are harvesting.)

Chris: Hey, can I help?  
Applejack: Well sure. You can either help Big Mac with hauling, Applebloom with loading Big Mac up, or getting the apples down.  
Chris: Okay, I'll try that last one.

(Chris kicks a tree as he winches, and an apple falls on his head, knocking him out.)

Applejack: Chris, Chris, are you alright?  
Chris: Ow... Maybe I'll just load it up.

(Chris grabs a barrel and loads it as Applebloom does the same.)

Applebloom: Hey Chris, did ya hear Doug's story of the Pied Piper?  
Chris: Oh yeah. I loved that story as a kid.

(They do it for awhile until Chris begins getting exhausted while Applebloom's still going strong.)

Chris: Urgh... I don't think I have the energy to do this sort of stuff for awhile. Hey Big Mac, mind if I help you pull?  
Big Mac: Nope.  
Chris: Great!

(Chris waits for Applebloom to load his cart and tries to pull, but makes it to the farm in twice the time it takes Big Mac.)

Chris (gasping): I guess this isn't much of a place for a beginner like me. If you ever really need help, let me know, but... Well... Do you mind if I take off?  
Big Mac: Nope.  
Chris: Thanks. See you and the other Apples around, Big Mac.  
Big Mac: Eyup.

(Cut to later as Chris sees Rainbow Dash and Rob clearing up the sky.)

Chris: Hey, can I help?  
Rainbow Dash: Sorry Chris. You gotta fly to do this.

(Rob punches several clouds and totals loads of them.)

Rob: YEAH!  
Chris: Aw... Okay.

(Scootaloo speeds up on her scooter and plows through a cloud with it.)

Scootaloo: Sweetie Belle said that Rarity might need some help.  
Chris: AWESOME!

(Cut to Carousel Boutique as Chris arrives.)

Sweetie Belle: Hi Chris.  
Chris: Hey, I heard your sister needed help.  
Rarity: Oh thank goodness! I need a model for Doug, Rob, and John's Nightmare Night costumes!

(Rarity grabs Chris.)

Chris: WHOA!

(Cut to Chris in a blue wizard's robe as Rarity is setting the pins.)

Rarity: Oh, yes, yes.  
Chris: So, is this for John?  
Rarity: Oh no, it's for Doug.  
Chris: Oh.

(Chris wiggles a little.)

Rarity: Darling, could you please hold still?  
Chris: Sorry.

(Cut to him wearing a Ponified version of Captain America's outfit from Captain America the First Avenger.)

Chris: Ooh... Is this for Rob?  
Rarity: Naturally.  
Chris: Cool.

(He moves his foreleg in a swinging motion.)

Rarity: Okay Chris, hold still a little longer.

(Cut to Chris in a Captain Britain outfit as he's gasping.)

Chris: Rarity... I think this is too tight.  
Rarity: Oh dear. Don't worry. I made sure it matched the guys' sizes, so I just need to see how they look. Oh, it looks great. Oh, and I may need a few more, up for staying for a bit longer.  
Chris: No way! I can't stay still any longer!

(Chris runs off.)

Rarity: Thanks for your help, Chris.

(Cut to Chris running into Fluttershy.)

Fluttershy: Hey Chris, could you help me? I've gotta go grocery shopping, and I need help looking after all my animal friends.  
Chris: No problem.

(Cut to Fluttershy returning home as the animals have Chris in a boiling pot.)

Fluttershy: Oh my. What happened?  
Chris: There was a problem.

(Fluttershy helps Chris out as he goes off.)

Chris: Oh... Now what? Ooh! Ooh! Twilight! Maybe I can help her!

(Chris runs to Twilight as she's with Doug looking over the Spells of Asteroth when Chris arrives.)

Chris: Hey Twilight, anything I can do?  
Twilight: No, not really. I've been pretty busy looking for that new Portal Spell for Queen Amalthea and Princess Celestia.  
Doug: And Princess Luna.  
Chris: Aw... Really?  
Twilight: Yup.

(Chris walks off sadly. Cut to outside as Chris walks out.)

Chris: Oh, what am I gonna do? I'm not strong enough to help out at Sweet Apple Acres. I can't fly to help clear the sky. I can't stand still, so Rarity can model her outfits on me. I'm not good with animals at all, and Twilight doesn't need any help.

(Pinkie comes up.)

Pinkie: Hi Chris. What's wrong?  
Chris: I can't do anything.  
Pinkie: Ooh! You can help me play with the Cake Twins!  
Chris: Ooh...

(Cut to Sugar Cube Corner as the Twins are sitting there as Pinkie and Chris arrive.)

Chris: Hey kids, up to playing with your Aunt Pinkie and Uncle Chris?  
Cake Twins: Yay!

(They play with them and laugh happily as a Cutie Mark, a smiley face, appears on Chris' flank.)

Chris: This is the bestest best day ever!

The End.


	8. Sea Ponies

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 8: Sea Ponies

(It opens at the library as everyone is there with Spike belching out a letter.)

Twilight: It's from Princess Celestia. "My dear friends, my regal mother, Queen Amalthea, has informed me that Sea Ponies arrived in Equestria with her when she brought the Ponies Asteroth was experimenting with here, and myself and Princess Luna would like you to try and find them. Sincerely yours, Princess Celestia."  
Doug: Well that's easy. We just gotta get to the sea.  
Twilight: Cool.

(They head off.)

Doug: _Down to the sea we go,  
Down to a world below-  
_Rob: Stop! Stop it! You're not doing a song while I'm here.  
Doug: But you sang last week.  
Rob: That was a moment of weakness. It won't happen again.  
Chris: Oh, come on! We could do a sing-around!  
John: Yes, that would speed things along quite nicely.  
Applebloom: Ooh, ooh, I got one! Doug sang it to our class yesterday.  
_It's a difficult responsibility...  
When you accept an appointment from his majesty...  
_Sweetie Belle: _You must strive for just the perfect quality..._  
Scootaloo: _When you're the first toy maker to the king.  
_Rarity: Oh, that's lovely.  
Applebloom: _All the soldiers must stand erect.  
Or the king, they don't protect.  
_Scootaloo: _The balls must bounce much higher,  
If they're to please his royal sire.  
_Sweetie Belle: _The ballerinas must pirouette  
Upon their musical toes.  
_Doug: _And the clowns must make a king forget all of his kingly whoas.  
_Applejack: _It's a difficult responsibility..._  
Pinkie: _When you accept an appointment from his majesty...  
_Rarity: _You must strive for just the perfect quality...  
_Rainbow Dash: _When you're the first toymaker to the King.  
_Fluttershy: _All the sail boats must never sink.  
And the dollies always blink.  
_Twilight: _The teddy bears be furry,  
If they're to gain his royal curry.  
_Pinkie: _The Jackie Boxes must always pop  
At every regal command.  
_Rarity: _And the kangaroos must learn to hop  
Into the prince's hand.  
_Chris: _It's a difficult responsibility...  
_Doug: _When you accept an appointment from his majesty...  
_John: _You must strive for just the perfect quality...  
_Rob: _When you're the first... Toy... Makers to the king...!  
_  
(They all laugh and continue on. Cut to night as they're halfway to the sea and set up camp. Chris and Pinkie are playing tic-tac-toe.)

Chris: XXX! I win!  
Pinkie: Ooh, you're good.  
Doug: Hey, how about a ghost story?  
Scootaloo: The Headless Horse?  
Doug: Not completely. The Headless Horseman!  
Pinkie: What's that?  
Doug: Back home there was a soldier who lost his head in a war at New York.  
Now gather 'round, and I'll elucidate  
Of what goes on outside when it gets late.  
Along about midnight the ghosts and banshees  
Get together for their nightly jamborees.  
There's things with horns and saucer eyes!  
Some with fangs about this size.  
Sweetie Belle: Some are fat.  
Applebloom: And some are thin.  
Rob: And some don't even wear their skin.  
Oh, I'm telling you buddy; it's a frightful sight,  
To see what goes on the dead of night.

(A wind blows as Scootaloo jumps onto Rainbow Dash's back as she comforts him.)

John: When _spooks have a midnight jamboree...  
They break it up with fiendish glee...  
_Doug: _Ghosts are bad, but the one that's cursed  
Is the Headless Horseman. He's the worst.  
_Sweetie Belle: _That's right,  
He's the fright.  
In the Dead of Night.  
_Doug: _For when he goes a jogging 'cross the land...  
Carrying his noggin in his hand...  
Demons take one look and groan  
And hit the road for parts unknown.  
_Applebloom: _Beware,  
Take care.  
He rides alone.  
_Doug: _There's no spook like a spook who's spurned.  
They don't like him, and he's really burned.  
He swears to the longest day he's dead...  
He'll show them that he can get a head.  
_  
(Rob decides to join in.)

Rob: _They say he's tired of his flaming top.  
He's got a yearn to make a swap.  
So he rides one night each year,  
To find a head in a hallow there!  
_Pinkie: _He likes 'em little.  
He likes 'em big.  
_Chris: _Parted in the middle  
Or a wig.  
_Rob: _Black or white or even red,  
_Doug: _The Headless Horseman needs a head!  
_Everyone:_ With a hip-hip and a clippity clop,  
He's out looking for a top to chop!  
So don't try to figure out a plan!  
You can't reason with a Headless Man!  
_Doug:_ Now if you doubt this tale is so,  
One met that spook many years ago.  
Now he didn't stop for a second look,  
But made for a bridge as fast as he could.  
For once you cross a bridge my friend,  
The ghost is through his power ends!  
_Rob: _So when we're riding tomorrow night,  
Make for the bridge with all our might.  
He'll be down in a hallow there.  
He needs a head!  
Look out! Beware!  
_Everyone: _With a hip-hip and a clippity clop,  
He's out looking for a top to chop!  
So don't try to figure out a plan!  
You can't reason with a Headless Man!  
_Scootaloo: Awesome! Is he really real?  
Doug: Nah. It was just a hoax, but still kinda cool.  
Scootaloo: Definitely. Ooh... What if the Headless Horseman rides the Headless Horse!  
Fluttershy: ... Oh my, then no wonder they're so lost if they're here when they're supposed to be in Doug's home.

(Everyone has a laugh and goes to sleep. Cut to later as they walk to the sea where the Sea Ponies are supposed to be.)

Twilight: Um... Hi Sea Ponies. I'm Princess Twilight Sparkle, and I was wondering if you'd like to talk about being friends with Equestria.

(There's no sign of life in the sea.)

Rob (mentally): Please no one suggest singing again. Please no one suggest singing again.  
Pinkie: Ooh! Ooh! Maybe they respond to singing!  
Rob: D'oh!  
Pinkie: _Hey there Sea Ponies!  
We wanna be your friends!  
'Cause when your friends with us,  
The party never ends!  
So what do you say?  
Wanna come up to say "Hi"?!  
If not we'll be real sad,  
To have to say "Good-bye".  
_  
(A pink Sea Pony comes up, looking like a giant sea horse.)

Sea Pony: Hi.  
Pinkie: Hi. Wanna be friends with us?  
Sea Pony: Ooh yeah!  
Twilight: Our main leaders can be here pretty soon to talk to yours.  
Sea Pony: Yay!

(The gang smiles and heads off as Amalthea, Celestia, and Luna arrive.)

Celestia: Well done My Little Ponies.  
Rob: Eh-hem.  
Luna: And... Whatever Rob is. I don't even know.

(Rob sighs, and they head off.)

Sweetie Belle: Oh, that was so great!  
_We did it...! We did it...!  
We made friends with the Sea Ponies!  
_Rob: Stop it! Stop it! There's been enough singing today!  
Fluttershy: Oh, and I had an idea with a song, though I guess you wouldn't like it.  
Rob: ... What was it?

(Fluttershy does a little song as they head home.)

The End.


	9. Rainbow Crush

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 9: Rainbow Crush

(It opens as Doug does a quick trick with Rainbow Dash as they finish it up.)

Rainbow Dash: Doug, your flying abilities are now fifty percent cooler!  
Doug: Wow, and we were only shooting for twenty. Hey, I was figuring on taking a walk around the place to kinda see all the hangouts, any ideas?  
Rainbow Dash: Hey, how about I take you?  
Doug: What? Really?  
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, you're a friend, and I'd be honored.  
Doug: Well thanks buddy. I'll be set by four.  
Rainbow Dash: Awesome!

(Cut to four as Doug arrives at the door with flowers.)

Doug: Hey RD. These are for you.

(Doug puts the flowers in a vase for her.)

Rainbow Dash: Oh, that's so cool.  
Doug: Yeah, I should thank you. I haven't been out with someone outside of a birthday party or a family outing since November.  
Rainbow Dash: Well maybe this can be an unofficial date. You know, practice our moves on each other.  
Doug: Ooh, cool! Well, let's head out.

(They do so. Cut to a restaurant.)

Doug: I will have the taco salad.  
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, I'll have the same.

(They hand their menus to the waiter who heads off.)

Doug: So I get to see Rainbow Dash's moves on a date, so what are they?  
Rainbow Dash: Well, I only have two big starter moves. The first one is basically a bottle of soda sent to the table "from a fan", and I just go, "Oh, this is so embarrassing. Can't I go anywhere without getting recognized?"  
Doug: Oh, I've heard that move. I guess Wonder Bolt status has a lot of power to it.  
Rainbow Dash: Totally. Oh, and also, another move is, "I was going to wait for you to be ready to kiss me, but you're so handsome, I just can't wait."  
Doug: Whoa! Now that was the show stopper, right there. I almost leaned in.  
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, so what are some of your moves?  
Doug: Okay, I only have one... So, where'd you grow up?  
Rainbow Dash: Grow up? That's it? Boy Doug, you're lucky you're nice.  
Doug: Just answer the question.  
Rainbow Dash: Okay, I grew up in Cloudsdale.  
Doug: So close to your parents?  
Rainbow Dash: Eh, we care about each other, but we haven't been that close in a while.  
Doug: Oh really? Why?  
Rainbow Dash: I don't know. There's always seemed to have been this distance between us ever since I left flight school. We pretend it's not there, but it is.  
Doug: Wow, sounds hard.  
Rainbow Dash: It is... I just- Whoa! Awesome! And it's so simple. You go around any big defenses in a minute!  
Doug: Yup.  
Rainbow Dash: Awesome.

(Cut to the end of the day as Rainbow Dash and Doug get back to the guys' house as the two are laughing.)

Rainbow Dash: Oh man, that was the most awesome night I ever had in my life!  
Doug: Yeah. It was great.  
Rainbow Dash: So, I never really have that many end of the night moves, but how about you?  
Doug: Not really. I just make a joke, you know like... "See you up there, RD."

(Rainbow Dash laughs.)

Rainbow Dash: Wow.  
Doug: Well goodnight, RD.

(Doug goes to his room.)

Rainbow Dash: Yeah, good night.

(Rainbow Dash walks off confused. Cut to later as Rainbow Dash is at the town thinking.)

Rainbow Dash (mentally): That's weird. I mean, Doug's a friend. Just a friend. That was totally just a side effect of the unofficially date.

(Doug walks past.)

Doug: Hey RD.  
Rainbow Dash: Hey. (Mentally) Oh, he's so handsome! ... Wait...

(She rushes to Sugar Cube Corner and gets to Pinkie.)

Rainbow Dash: Pinkie, I need you to keep a secret!  
Pinkie: Cross my heart and hope to cry! Stick a cupcake in my eye!  
Rainbow Dash: Okay... Okay... I have a crush on Doug.

(Pinkie gasps.)

Rainbow Dash: Don't worry. It's not a big deal. I'm sure I'll forget all about him once he gets back home.  
Pinkie: Okay, but don't worry! Your secret's safe with me.

(Rainbow Dash and Pinkie shake hooves.)

The End.


	10. Good News

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 10: Good News

(It opens in Ponyville as the gang is talking together when Shining Armor and Cadence arrive.)

Twilight: Shining Armor! Cadence!

(Twilight runs to Shining Armor and nuzzles him before going to Cadence and doing their little dance.)

Twilight & Cadence: Sunshine! Sunshine! Ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake!

(They laugh as Twilight recomposes herself.)

Twilight: So, what are you two doing here?  
Shining Armor: We've got great news for you, Twilie. Cadence is pregnant.  
Twilight: ... You mean you guys are gonna have a foal! Oh Celestia, that's so great! I'm gonna be an aunt, and you're gonna be parents!  
Pinkie: PARTY!

(Cut to Sugar Cube Corner as everyone's there while Shining Armor and Cadence sit in the center.)

Chris: Why, you two must be so happy! In a few months, a baby foal's gonna be born when your-  
Doug: Chris, Chris, why don't you help Pinkie and the Cakes serve the food?  
Chris: Oh, right.  
Cadence: So you're this Doug guy. Nice to meet you.  
Doug: Nice to meet you and Shining Armor too, ma'am. Twilight always talks about you two.  
Shining Armor: Aw, that's nice.  
Rob: So you guys do get pregnant? For a minute, I thought your kids are delivered by storks in something like this old cartoon called Baby Bottleneck.  
Applebloom: What's that about?  
Rob: I'll tell you later.  
Applebloom: Alright.  
John: May I be among those who will congratulate you and your husband, your highness?  
Cadence: Sure.

(John kisses Cadence's hoof and hands her some flowers he pulls out of nowhere.)

Cadence: Not bad, Mr. Brown.

(Everyone congratulates her.)

The End.


	11. Storytime II: The Three Little Ponies

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 11: Storytime II: The Three Little Ponies

(It opens as Doug arrives at the school house again.)

Doug: Hey everypony!  
Foals: Hey Doug!  
Doug: Today I'd like to tell you little foals about always being prepared.

(Cut to a row of houses.)

Doug: Once upon a time, in a lovely little stretch of land, there lived three ponies. Applejack, Big Macintosh, and Applebloom. The three of them had just moved out of the farm they all lived on and had just constructed homes of their own. Applebloom, the youngest, being naive about the dangerous world around her, made her house out of straw, so that the breeze could go through and cool her down during a hot day. Big Mac, being the oldest, biggest, and strongest, made his house out of sticks as he was sure he could take anything that would want to attack him. The other Pony, Applejack, figured that it was better to be safe than sorry, and made a brick house to keep her safe.

(Applejack goes to the two.)

Applejack: Now listen here, are y'all sure about this? I mean none of these houses'll keep ya save if a wolf comes a callin'.  
Applebloom: Come on, Applejack. there aint no wolves in our town, and even if there were, Big Mac could take 'em out.  
Big Mac: Eyup.  
Applejack: Well I hope you two are right, but if ya need help, my door's always opened to ya.

(Cut to that night as the wolf comes to Applebloom's house and knocks.)

Wolf: Little Pony, Little Pony, let me come in.  
Applebloom: Not by the hair on my- Well I don't have no hair on my chinny-chin-chin, but my answer is no!  
Wolf: Then I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow the house in.

(The wolf blows the house down.)

Applebloom: Uh-oh.

(Applebloom runs to Big Mac's door and knocks as Big Mac lets her in.)

Applebloom: Big Macintosh, it's awful! There's this big bad wolf, and he blew my house down! He's as big as you! Maybe even a little bigger.  
Big Mac: Now calm down there, Little Sister. I'm sure we'll be fine.

(There's a knock.)

Big Mac: Eyup?  
Wolf: Little Ponies, Little Ponies, let me come in.  
Big Mac: Nope.  
Wolf: Then I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in!  
Applebloom: Oh, and he means it too!

(The wolf blows the house down and he's taller and more muscular than Big Mac.)

Applebloom: Told ya he was bigger.  
Big Mac: Eyup.

(They rush to Applejack's house as she lets them in.)

Applejack: See? You should've thought ahead and made stronger houses, now I'll be pleased as punch to let y'all live here, and we'll build the extra rooms in the morning. Right now, just stay here, and that mean old wolf won't get none of us.  
Big Mac: Nope.  
Applebloom: We're sorry that we didn't listen to ya, Applejack.  
Big Mac: Eyup.  
Applejack: Now don't fret none. We're all gonna make it outta this fine.  
Big Mac: Eyup.

(The wolf comes up.)

Wolf: Little Ponies, Little Ponies let me come in. (Pause) Little Ponies, Little Ponies let me come in! (Pause) You're supposed to say "Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin!"

(Applejack opens the door and stands there.)

Applejack: Are you implying I have facial hair, pal?!  
Wolf: Uh no. I only meant-

(Applejack kicks the wolf into a tree and closes the door as he comes back.)

Wolf: Fine! Then I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in!

(He does so but fails, and each time he huffs and puffs again, the trio plays a piano as a joke until he stops, gasping for air.)

Applebloom: We did it! He won't come in now!  
Applejack: Oh he might, but I got a plan for him.

(She sets down a pot over the fire place as the wolf comes down through the chimney and shoots out.)

Applebloom: Whoo-hoo! Now he won't ever come back to these parts!  
Big Mac: Eyup.  
Applejack: Yup.  
Applebloom: Mm-hm.

(Cut back to the classroom.)

Doug: From there, Applejack built extra rooms for Big Mac and Applebloom, and they all lived Happily Ever After.  
Foals: YAY!

The End.


	12. Nightmare Night II

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 12: Nightmare Night II

(It opens at the library on Nightmare Night as the guys walk up to Twilight, dressed as the librarian from the Crystal Empire, walks up.)

Twilight: Oh cool, Doug! You're Star Swirl the Bearded!  
Doug: What? No. I'm Schmendrick the Magician.  
Twilight: Oh, your ancestor! That's even cooler! So who are you, Rob?  
Rob: Captain... America...!  
Twilight: Who?  
Rob: A superhero!  
John: I'm Captain Britain.  
Twilight: Okay, so who are you, Chris?  
Chris: I'm Thor!  
Twilight: Thor?  
Chris: Well It hurts getting this thing fitted.  
Rob: Urgh...  
Doug: So, let's go party!  
Rob: YEAH!

(They go there as Applejack arrives as a scarecrow again, and Pinkie's a pig.)

Pinkie: Ooh Rob, are you an arrow target?  
Rob: No! I'm... Captain... America...!  
Applejack: ... Who?  
Rob: A superhero.

(The Cutie Mark Crusaders arrive. Applebloom's the Pied Piper. Sweetie Belle's a pirate, and Scootaloo's a Shadow Bolt.)

Applebloom: Do ya think Princess Luna will come again? She's a lotta fun.  
Twilight: I'm sure.

(A carriage arrives with Princess Luna and Queen Amalthea.)

Doug: Oh hi, Amalthea.  
Amalthea: ... Ah, Doug. You're dressed as Schmendrick. An interesting choice.  
Luna: ... Who's Rob supposed to be?  
Rob: Captain... America...!  
Luna: ... Who?  
Rob: Oh, forget it.  
Doug: Amalthea, what are you doing here?  
Amalthea: I have heard of this... This "celebration" as you call it, and it is an affront to my daughter!  
Chris: ... Huh?  
Amalthea: Every year ponies celebrate a very hard time in my child's life, and tonight shall be the last Nightmare Night!  
Sweetie Belle: Aw. I was getting a lot of good ideas for costumes from Doug's stories.  
Luna: Mother, it is just good fun as Applejack and Pinkie Pie would say.  
Pinkie: Yeah, fun! You know what fun is, right?  
Amalthea: ...  
Rob: Seriously? You don't know what fun is?  
Doug: Well she has been caged in our world for eleven centuries.  
Pinkie: Then let me and Chris spell it out for ya!  
_F is for friends who do stuff together.  
U is for you and me.  
N is for anywhere and anytime at all.  
Right here with my friends, you see.  
_Try it, your highness!  
Amalthea: _F is for fire that dies with the Red Bull!  
U is for Unicorn gore.  
N is for no casualties-  
_Chris: Queen Amalthea, that's not what fun is about. That's more like war. Now, try it like this.  
_F is for friends who do stuff together.  
U is for Ukulele.  
_Try it!  
Amalthea: _N is for anywhere and anytime at all.  
_Everypony: _Right here with my best buddy!  
_Luna: See Mother? We're just having fun with our friends. Not at a mistake I made.  
Amalthea: Well... Let us see what fun there is to be had.  
Pinkie & Chris: Okay!  
Everyone: _F is for frolic through all the flowers!  
U is for unending candies.  
N is for nose licking.  
Sharing gum and sand licking.  
Here with my new buddies!  
_  
(Everyone laughs as they relax.)

Amalthea: Very well, you have convinced me. Now... Did you hear of the adorable little constellation, Luna made last night?  
Luna: Mother... I'm eleven hundred and three years old.  
Doug: Dang, you're well preserved.

(Twilight smacks Doug upside the head.)

Doug: Ow.  
Amalthea: Oh, and let me tell you, I was as proud as when Luna used the-  
Luna (quickly): I'm going to talk to Rainbow Dash now.

(Rainbow Dash arrives as Rob.)

Rob: Why are you me?  
Rainbow Dash: This! It's Manlivity time! Manlivity!  
Rob: I don't talk like that!

(Luna sneaks off as Doug watches.)

Doug: Guys, I have an idea.  
Rob: The last time you had an idea, I became a pony-dragon thing!  
Doug: Don't worry, this is a good idea.

(Cut to Doug knocking on Fashion Boutique as Rarity answers.)

Rarity: Oh Doug, is something wrong with your costume?  
Doug: No. I was just wondering if you could meet up with the gang.  
Rarity: But I'm not dressed for this!  
Doug: Come on, Rarity. It's important.  
Rarity: Well, alright.

(Cut to Rob knocking on Fluttershy's door.)

Fluttershy: GO AWAY! I DON'T HAVE ANY CANDY!  
Rob: No, no. I just need to talk to you, Fluttershy.

(Fluttershy comes out.)

Fluttershy: Why are you dressed like one of those superheroes I saw when we were at Doug's old apartment?  
Rob: Thank you! Anyway, Doug needs you to meet up with the others.  
Fluttershy: Oh, I um...  
Rob: Don't worry. It's just a small gathering to talk to Princess Luna.  
Fluttershy: Well... Okay.

(Cut to the statue of Nightmare Moon as Luna's hiding behind it.)

Doug: Hi Luna.  
Luna: Ah!

(Luna backs up.)

Luna: Don't do that!  
Doug: Sorry. Me and the others just wanted to talk to you.

(The others show up.)

Doug: We just wanted to say that if you're embarrassed by your mom, you're not alone. Look at me, my mom recorded when I stuffed my first birthday cake into my mouth.  
Luna: Aw, that's cute... Oh...  
Rob: My parents... They um... Uh... Hey cool! I'm the only one with cool parents!  
Chris: My parents forget when I'm about to head off to do something.  
Twilight: My mom and dad try to act like it's still two decades ago.  
Rarity: My mother and father have absolutely no fashion sense.  
Rainbow Dash: My mom and dad try to act all modern.  
Fluttershy: My mom and dad keep trying to get me to go back to flight school.  
Pinkie: My mom calls me Pinkamina.  
Doug: Isn't that your name?  
Pinkie: Well yeah, but I prefer Pinkie.  
Applejack: My mama and daddy would tell anypony I met about how I ate a whole plate of apple fritters at my first family reunion.  
Doug: See Luna? We all have an embarrassing moment with our parents. So how about we join the party?

(Luna smiles and nods. Cut to the party as they play games as Luna wins the spider toss.)

Amalthea: That's my baby girl out there!

(Luna smiles and blushes as she continues to talk to people.)

The End.


	13. Home

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 4**

Episode 13: Home

(It opens at the boys' house as Rob is poking Doug.)

Rob: Doug, Doug wake up.  
Doug: What's up?  
Rob: I'm sick of waiting to get home! We're looking through that stupid book ourselves!  
Doug: Okay, I'll just tell Twilight to-  
Rob: No, right now! We're getting over there, right now!  
Doug: Rob... It's one in the morning. For goodness sake, Princess Luna isn't up right now!  
Rob: Doug, we've been gone for three months! I don't freaking care what time it is!  
Doug: Okay, fine. You know, you've been real bossy since you became... Whatever you are.

(Doug, Rob, and Chris go to the library and go in.)

Chris: Wait, where's John?  
Doug: He's not going back. He said so a few nights ago.  
Rob: Yeah, yeah, where's the book?!  
Doug: Here.

(Doug brings the Spells of Asteroth out and looks through it.)

Doug: Oh hey, a Traveling Spell... But that's for the world you're already in. Um... Hey, here's one, but the lettering's so faded, I can't make out what the spell does.  
Rob: Well then try it out! That must be it!  
Doug: Um... Okay...

(Doug recites the spell in some forgotten language... And nothing happens.)

Rob: What the-? Nothing happened. Nothing happened! I can't believe this!  
Doug: Dude, quiet. You don't wanna wake up, Twilight.

(Doug puts the book back.)

Doug: Let's just go back to the house and rest.  
Rob: ... Fine.

(They head off as the book glows. Cut to the next morning as Doug wakes up in a POV shot as he walks around.)

Doug: Oh... I feel like I just died or something.

(Doug goes to a mirror as Spike walks up.)

Spike: Morning Twilight.

(Doug looks around for Twilight and finds he's in the library.)

Doug: How'd I get here?  
Spike: Twilight, you live here, and what happened to your voice?

(Doug keeps looking around for Twilight as he catches a look of himself in the mirror, and it's Twilight's reflection staring back at him.)

Doug: AH! What am I doing in Twilight's body?!  
Spike: Oh... Boy. Let me guess, Doug.  
Doug: Oh man, oh man, oh man. What happened?!

(Cut to Rob waking up in Fluttershy's body as he walks around when he spots Angel Bunny.)

Rob: Hey man, what are you doing here?

(Angel Bunny stares in shock.)

Rob: What?

(Rob looks in the mirror and sees that he's in Fluttershy's body.)

Rob: Amalthea's horn, I'm a girl!

(Rob breaks down and cries.)

Rob: It's not fair! I'm a man! A MAN!

(Angel points to a picture of the gang at Sweet Apple Acres, particularly Big Mac, the stallion.)

Rob: Shut up! Just shut up!

(Cut to Chris waking up in Applejack's body as Applebloom comes in.)

Applebloom: Applejack, get up!  
Chris: Huh? Applejack's here?  
Applebloom: ... Uh-oh.  
Chris: Uh-oh? What uh-oh?

(Chris looks out Applejack's window and sees her reflection.)

Chris: Hey Applejack, what are you doing out there?  
Applebloom: Uh... Chris, that's your reflection.  
Chris: Uh-oh.

(Cut to John as he gets up and walks around, noticing the decor of the room he's in.)

John: Hm... This doesn't look like my room.

(He sees that he's become Rarity.)

John: ... Oh... Sweetie Belle's in for a shock.

(He goes down as Sweetie Belle's there.)

Sweetie Belle: Hey Rarity! I- What's wrong?  
John: Now, you may not believe this, but-  
Sweetie Belle: John? You're in Rarity's body? Well then where's Rarity?  
John: Well one could assume that she's in my body.

(Cut to Sugar Cube Corner, Pinkie's room, as Rainbow Dash wakes up in Pinkie's body, and notices that she's pink.)

Rainbow Dash: Say huh?

(Rainbow Dash goes to the mirror to find Pinkie staring back.)

Rainbow Dash: Oh no!

(Cut to Pinkie as she's in Rainbow Dash's body, talking to her reflection.)

Pinkie: Rainbow Dash, please stop talking while I'm talking! I- Wait... This is a mirror, so... Ooh... A mystery!

(Pinkie puts on a Sherlock Holmes hat.)

Pinkie: The game's a foot... That's a funny expression!

(Cut to the boys' house as the girls wake up in their bodies.)

Rarity: Oh dear lord! Now all I can make are tuxedos!  
Applejack: Tuxedos? We got more important things ta worry about! Like how we've all switched bodies with the boys!  
Fluttershy: Oh, I hope Rob and Angel Bunny are okay.  
Twilight: Okay everypony, let's just calm down and get to the library.

(Everyone meets up at the library as Doug lets them in.)

Rainbow Dash: Okay, what the heck happened?!  
Doug: It's all my fault. I was looking through the Spells of Asteroth to speed along our chance to get home, and I found this page that had the title of it worn out. I read the spell, and I guess what it did was switch all of us up. I've been trying to use the Cut-Off spell, but it's not working.  
Twilight: Ooh... That's not good.  
Rob: Well what are we supposed to do?! Live our lives inside other people?!  
Twilight: I'm sure there must be some way to reverse this spell, and Doug and I will look through it. You guys just... Well... Do what you normally do, I guess.  
Rarity: Well if I'm going to spend an indefinite amount of time as a male, John must come with me to the Carousel Boutique at once!  
John: Why?  
Rarity: I've got to get as many dresses out as possible before everypony thinks I'm some sort of a weirdo.

(They head off as Twilight goes to the book while Doug mopes on the floor.)

Twilight: Doug, are you alright?  
Doug: This was all my fault. I shouldn't have read that stupid spell.  
Twilight: Hey, come on. You had no idea this would happen. Come on... Who's the best body guard around?  
Doug: Those guys in Canterlot?  
Twilight: Come on, Doug, you know what I meant.  
Doug: Alright.

(Cut to Rob and Fluttershy.)

Fluttershy: You know I just don't understand how Doug did what he did. It just doesn't seem like him.  
Rob: Yeah... It's so weird.

(Rob looks down as Angel Bunny taps his foot.)

Rob: What are you staring at?!

(Cut to Sweet Apple Acres as Chris stands there with Applejack and Applebloom.)

Applejack: Alright now, since you got my body, you gotta help us out here.  
Chris: Right!

(Chris kicks the tree as all the apples fall down on top of him.)

Chris: Help! I'm lost in apples!

(Applejack actually chuckles a little and helps Chris out.)

Applejack: That was mighty respectable, but ya might wanna wait 'till some barrels are put under the next tree.  
Chris: Oh yeah.

(Cut to Rarity and John at the Fashion boutique.)

John: Hey, what do you think of a bit of gold in this outfit right here?  
Rarity: ... John dear, that's your magician's outfit... Brilliant!

(Rarity does so and tries it on for John.)

Rarity: Oh darling, you'll look ravishing in this once Doug and Twilight undo that spell.  
John: Indeed. After all, there's nothing quite like getting in touch with one's feminine side.

(Cut to Pinkie clearing the sky as it's a bright sunny day.)

Pinkie: Yay! Sunshine!  
Rainbow Dash: Well... That's about it.  
Pinkie: Aw.

(Cut to Fluttershy's place as Rob looks out the window as Fluttershy comes up.)

Fluttershy: Um, Rob are you-  
Rob: Alright, I confess! I did it!  
Fluttershy: Um... Did what?  
Rob: I convinced Doug to go to the library at one in the morning! I convinced Doug to look through the book! I convinced Doug to read the page with the worn away title! I'm the reason we're all switched around! Oh please, just make the guilt stop!  
Fluttershy: Oh my. Well Rob, I think you're gonna have to explain to Twilight and assure Doug that it wasn't his fault.  
Rob: Right!

(They arrive.)

Rob: Okay Twilight, it was my fault we were here and Doug read the spell! Doug's just so kind and a good friend that he blames himself!  
Twilight: Yeah, that makes more sense.

(The book glows.)

Twilight: Hey what the-? The counter spell! It just appeared in the book!

(Twilight reads it, and they all return to normal and rush into the library to say.)

Rarity: Oh thank goodness! We're all back to our proper selves! I was afraid I'd have to start wearing... Oh, I can't even bring myself to say it.  
Doug: Shorts?  
Rarity: Shut it!  
Doug: Sorry.  
Rob: Whoo! We're back to normal! ... Also, I'm sorry everypony. This whole mess was my fault. I guess I was just a little too wrapped up in getting home, and not wrapped up enough in how all of you were so hospitable. I promise I'll never try another short cut again.  
Twilight: Oh, here's a portal spell. Oh, and it's so easy! We can send you boys home right away! ... And say good-bye to each other.

(Everyone looks down as Pinkie cries.)

Chris: Oh no, Pinkie! Don't cry! 'Cause that'll just make me... I DON'T WANNA GO!  
Doug: Um... Well I guess this is it. Thanks for everything everypony.  
Applebloom: Does this mean you won't be tellin' our class anymore stories?  
Doug: Probably, but hey, the best thing about stories is sharing them, like I did with you.  
Rob: Girls, I just wanna say... Well thanks. You really are the best mares I ever met.  
Rarity (smiling): Why Rob, I thought we were too girly for you.  
Rob: ... Well... Maybe I was wrong. It's still weird as heck here, but it's that good weird.

(Twilight opens the portal as Doug, Rob, and Chris leave.)

Scootaloo: Well, I guess that's it. We won't have any more fun with the guys.  
Celestia: Oh really?

(She, Luna, and Amalthea arrive.)

Amalthea: Twilight Sparkle, why did you think one of the criteria for your search was "simpler"?  
Twilight: Girls, I just realized something!

(Cut to the three at Doug's apartment as they look around. They're all human again with their Cutie Marks moving to their ankles.)

Doug: Whoa guys, check the date and time. It's the same day we left, only twenty minutes later to be exact.  
Chris: Oh cool, so it's like we never left.  
Rob: Yeah. I'm gonna check my messages on your computer, Doug.  
Doug: Sure.

(The buzzer goes off.)

Doug: Come on up.

(The door opens as everyone but Pinkie is there in their human form.)

Doug: Hey! What are you doing here?!  
Rainbow Dash: Well the key word is "simpler portal spell". We can all hang out in both places together now!  
Doug: Whoo-hoo!  
Twilight: And Queen Amalthea gave us a side mission. To discover what's left of this world's magic... If we come across any.  
Chris: Nice! ... Hey where's Pinkie?

(Cut to Rob watching the first episode of My Little Pony.)

Pinkie (statically): _When I was a little filly  
And the sun was going down..._  
Rob: Oh Pinkie, if you could get back here with the others, I'd laugh at ghosts too.

(Pinkie pops her head out of the computer.)

Pinkie: Hi!  
Rob: AH!

(Rob falls over as Pinkie comes out, turning human.)

Pinkie: Are you okay, Rob?  
Rob: Yeah, just caught me by surprise.

(Cut to Doug calling his aunt and uncle.)

Doug: Hey Aunt Linda, I just got accepted in this new school. Part of the curriculum involves a lot of traveling, at the school's expense, so you probably won't hear from me that much, but I'll check in on you guys whenever I'm in the neighborhood. Okay. Love you and Uncle Al too Aunt Linda. Good-bye.

(Rob and Chris just finish doing the same thing.)

John: Well you lot, up for a little trip to a fine fast food restaurant on me?  
Rarity: What do they have?  
Doug: There's a KFC a thirty minute's walk away.  
Applejack: Y'all eat chicken?  
Doug: Well we can find somewhere a bit more vegetarian, but for humans, it's a bit more of what kinda stuff we prefer to eat.  
Applejack: Well, I guess we can try it out.

(They head off.)

The End.


End file.
